Sickness and vampires

Lacrima and a rather ill Amu have a conversation about overdoing things. And stopping.

Date: 2016-11-02
Pose Count: 24
Amu Hinamori 2016-11-02 21:49:25 59481
Amu Hinamori was resting in her bed, a bowl of soup by her bed. She felt crummy and her parents, were of course, fawning over her. And it was embarrassing. Granted, she did like to be pampered. A little.

She was nestled into her bed, the patio door open and screen closed, letting fresh air in. She was home alone at the moment. Trying to regather her energy. She was looking a little better, thanks to Tadase.
Lacrima 2016-11-02 21:55:11 59482
Amu Hinamori is probably used to black cats who shall be unnamed appearing on her patio and inviting themselves in. Lacrima is in fact, not a black cat. She is however, a purple bat. And bat sort of rhymes with cat, right?

The tiny bat that Lacrima currently is flutters it's way to the patio and encounters the screen. It narrows it's eyes a little- and with a little poof of mist, the tiny purple bat sort of phases through it- and with another flare of energy---

Lacrima appears- getting out of her bat form- which sort of looks like unfurling shadows and the sense of dread dark energies for a moment.

She frowns. "I invited myself in. I hope that is not a problem." she says hesitantly.

Another pause. "Are you okay?" she asks in that hesitant deadpan still.
Amu Hinamori 2016-11-02 21:59:41 59483
Amu Hinamori slowly opened her eyes, then smiled. "Oh, Lacrima-chan. That's fine. I'm sorry I haven't been able to feed you lately. I've kind of been confined to my bed."

Her cheeks went a little red. "I'm fine, really. They say it's just, well... I kind of got pneumonia after not taking care of myself for so long. I'm kind of an idiot like that, huh?" she said with a soft chuckle. "Were, uhhh, you worried about me? Sorry. I should have called I just... haven't had the energy since--" She had a small coughing fit into her hand, giving a light shudder. "Everything. sorry..." She actually looked apologetic.

"Sorry I haven't been able to come by and help feed you any. Would you like to..." She trailed off. "I... I can't at the moment. But... but once I get better, I--" More coughs. "I'll be by then, okay? I promise..."
Lacrima 2016-11-02 22:08:39 59484
Lacrima softly purses her lips and head tilts. "I worry. It's easy for me to worry. Worry is one of the few emotions I can feel." she says. "But it's harder for me to stop worrying." she says.

She head tilts. "Your friend told me I should drain less from you." she says. "I agree. You were a mess at the dance you invited me to." she says flatly.

"I had to leave. That... sparkle... princess. Was making me itch- and feel uncomfortable." she says- referencing Usagi in Serenity Mode- with the glow.

She head tilts. "I've spoken to my... girlfriend?..." she says this like it's a question. "That. We're going to find some other way to handle my 'feeding'. She says. Or at least, not every single day from you." she says flatly.

"When your friends start asking me to 'lay off'-- if I don't, they're just going to come after me anyways- regardless of whether it's you being too insistent or not." she says deadpan.
Amu Hinamori 2016-11-02 22:13:46 59485
Amu Hinamori sighed and looked to the side. "Yeah, Usagi-chan can have that effect on people. I can't deny feeling a bit..." She instinctively pulled her knees to her chest. "I'll never be anywhere near as pretty as that... not even within miles..."

She then blinked and looked up. "O-oh, it's okay, I..." She then sighed. "You're right, of course. I was just... I'm so sorry. I was just--' she coughed into her knees for a few moments. "I just... I finally... when I was helping you, I felt like I was finally doing something good, you know? Like I was actually helping someone."

She gave a soft sigh. "I know I'm not like the... other girls. I don't fight monsters or... anything like that. I give kids pep talks and get run over by dogs. I'm not strong or have really good magical powers. I... jump. But when I was helping you I... I really felt like I was... doing something worthwhile. Like I was finally making some kind of... difference. And i got too absorbed in that and just... went too far. I'm sorry I dragged you into that. Can you forgive me?"
Lacrima 2016-11-02 22:30:47 59486
Lacrima head tilts. "I find it's normal for humans to be selfish. This is nothing new to me." she says. "Not that what I am is any better." she says. "But- at least I 'own it'?" she asks.

"Please do not misunderstand. It has been nice to feed without having to attack people. For a little while." she says. "But the fact of the matter is this can only end poorly for both you and me. You, getting tired, and me, being attacked by your friends." she says.

"Once in a while. It's okay. Please?" she asks. "But. This is stupid." she says.

"It's not like I can 'enjoy' anything- just merely be 'content'." she says.

She head tilts. "A difference? Well..." she taps her chin. "I'm not sure." She says.

"Maybe?" she asks.

"It's not like my viewpoints on things have changed any." she says flatly.
Amu Hinamori 2016-11-02 22:34:21 59487
Amu Hinamori nods, though she doesn't seem happy. "I'm sorry, Lacrima-chan. I just... get everything wrong, don't I?" she mumbled sadly, hugging her knees a little tighter. "I try to help a friend and I end up ruining everyone's dance. I'll be more careful after this, okay? No more... over expending myself and..." She glanced to the three sleeping eggs. Four, she supposed. "Or my charas."

She looked up. "want some soup? I'm not contagious and mom left some downstairs if you want it fresh. It's pretty good, mom made it from scratch. At least, she told me she did."
Lacrima 2016-11-02 22:43:39 59488
Lacrima head tilts. "I can't get sick anyways." she says. "or poisoned... or... die through conventional means anyways." she says. "Being kind of the living dead has that effect." she says flatly.

She purses her lips. "Is anyone downstairs?" she asks.

She purses her lips. "It's not like I arrived through the front door." she says.

She begins to step toward's the door unless Amu motions there's someone downstairs.

"Do you need anything while I'm down there?" she asks flatly.
Amu Hinamori 2016-11-02 22:47:29 59489
Amu Hinamori shook her head. "No, they're both out at work for the moment," she said with a smile. "Welllll... if you're going to be down there anyway... could you refill my water?" Holding out her glass and looking sheepish. Then coughing into her knees again.

She really was looking better, honest! but she'd looked like she was at death's door before so... once she was alone, Amu laid back down and stared at the roof. She was so exhausted and... she'd hoped she was getting through to her. But what if she wasn't? What if Lacrima really was... that? Was an emotionless, unfeeling machine? Forever?

She tried to resist crying, her eyes misting up a little.
Lacrima 2016-11-02 22:53:27 59490
Lacrima makes her way downstairs-- after taking Amu's watercup. She heads downstairs. There's a few minutes- and she comes back up. With a bowl of soup- and also water. She politely hands it over to Amu as she sits on the edge of the bed and begins to drink the soup. It is piping hot it seems. She doesn't seem to notice. Or care.

Does she notice Amu's eyes misting? Not yet.

"This is good soup." she says matter of factly. "I don't need to 'eat'." she says. "Like this. But. It's one of the few things I can do, that I could when I was human- and nothing about it has really changed. I can still 'taste' things. I mostly have the same tastes in food I used to have." she says.

"I'm really hoping that never changes on me." she says a little, almost worryingly.
Amu Hinamori 2016-11-02 22:56:15 59491
Amu Hinamori blinked and then smiled a little, wiping her eyes and taking the water. "R-really? That's good. If... if you wanna come over to eat, you can whenever you like. I'll let mom know, okay? She always likes it when I have friends over. Though..." She paused. "Ummmm... just be careful, okay? My parents are a teensy tiny bit... nuts. Okay, maybe I could just bring the food to you..." she gave a light chuckle.

"The others, they haven't... threatened your or anything, have they? Not tried to... well... hurt you in any way?" she asked, sounding a little worried. "I did let them know it was my decision..."
Lacrima 2016-11-02 23:07:44 59494
Lacrima frowns. "Your friend with the...purple hair?... bothered me at the dance about it. Lightly. I don't think she was trying to be mean to me, asking. More worried about you. Maybe. I'm not sure. That would be my best guess. I have a hard time determining through-- tone of voice." she says. "Anyways, she asked me to go easier on the draining." she says.

"I can imagine the next request would had been not so nice, however." she says flatly.

"That's how these things mainly work." she says.

"And how it has worked for me in the past." she says a little disappointedly.

She sighs a bit. "Your parents are nuts?" she asks. "I'm pretty sure that's all parents." she insists deadpan.
Amu Hinamori 2016-11-02 23:12:36 59496
Amu Hinamori blinked and then slowly inched down the bed, giving her a hug. "She was just worried about me. That's what friends do, they worry about each other. She just knows I'm kind of an idiot so she's hoping you'll look out for me and make sure I don't do anything stupid, that's all. She's coming around to like you, I'm sure."

Her hug was weak compared to how it used to be. She closed her eyes. "i like your shampoo, it smells nice. and yes, but my parents are extra nuts. I've been trying to hide them from my friends, heh heh."
Lacrima 2016-11-02 23:25:28 59500
Lacrima frowns. "I doubt it." she says. "Besides. I should... limit. My interaction. With people. At this moment in time." she says. "To those I..... feel... okay? with." she says. "That." she says. "For now. Until I figure out if I'm going to be okay after that... dream." she says.

"I didn't really. Go off the handle at that dance, even with the itchiness and uncomfortableness of that sparkle girl-- so that's a good sign, I think--- that I won't.... try to--- 'turn'-- if you could call it that-- anyone against their will." she says.

"I am starting to feel odder cravings." she admits. "Like. I think I may try to obtain a coffin." she says.

"For sleeping. Like. I feel like... I should be safer. In an enclosed space like that." she says squinting a bit.

She's hugged. Lacrima tries to hug weakly back. She's not really all that great at it at the moment. She's also her usual super cold to the touch.
Amu Hinamori 2016-11-02 23:31:27 59503
Amu Hinamori sighed and collapsed, closing her eyes and laying down with a light murmur, before smiling to her. "I think you're going to be fine. I think you're a great person, Lacrima-chan. Even if you don't." she gave a shudder. "Just, ummmm, promise to never drag anyone into it? Okay?" she asked with a nervous smile, gulping weakly. "Eh... heh heh... eh?"

She closed her eyes. "What other kinds of cravings?"
Lacrima 2016-11-02 23:45:44 59506
Lacrima head tilts. "I don't think there's enough space for two." she says. "Besides. I can't think of anyone I'd want to share a coffin with." this is a lie. There is one person! Not that'd she'd admit it.

"Huh?" she asks. "Well that's that and... just. Stuff." she says. "Like. The bat thing is newer." she says. "and I've found myself using it for unimportant trips rather than- step through the Dusk Zone." she says.

"Sometimes I just. Know. Or crave things sometimes." she says. "In odd manners." she admits. "Like. I know I'm going to be immortal, but I also know I won't stop aging, yet." she says. "So-- I don't need to worry about looking like a 7th grader for the rest of my life. I think I'll stop aging around...." she taps her bottom lip. "Well I don't know. I do know I won't turn into some sort of hag." she says matter of factly.

She sips at her soup. "I dunno, Amu." she says to her being fine. "I mean. Things are better than they were six months ago." she says. "I was a really bad mess, because I was purposely starving myself." she says. "About... after I got purified.. for the second time in a row. I stopped feeling bad about feeling." she admits.

"Purification..." she says. "It kind of... rips me apart?" she says. "And I have to rebuild myself." she says. "-- and sometimes I guess I lose a little part of something with it." she says. "Like... a chunk of me gets removed- but I can't reform that same chunk so I have to make a new one with dark energy wholesale." she says. "It feels odd. And weird. And always throws me off for a couple days." she says. "I act odder than usual until it settles. Then I have to figure out if I'm missing anything. Sometimes it isn't apparent immediatly." she says.
Amu Hinamori 2016-11-02 23:52:12 59508
Amu Hinamori took a slow, deep breath and nodded, listening to every word. "That's... pretty cool. Not all of it. But the bat thing. That's pretty awesome." She gave a soft yawn. "And... you know if you ever need help, I'm always here. Uhhhh, purification free, eh heh," she said with a nervous smile. Still feeling guilty about that time.

The smile wavered. "I'm so sorry I did that to you. I swear I didn't know at the time. If... if I had... I never would have... I wouldn't have hurt you... I thought I was doing the right thing..."
Lacrima 2016-11-02 23:58:02 59510
Lacrima frowns. "I didn't know at the time, either." she says. "That was the first time I got hit with something hard enough to feel ripped apart. Before that it was just...pot shots." she says. "It'd just 'feel bad' and I wouldn't lose anything." she says.

She frowns. "You were trying to 'heal me'." she says. "That's what those kind of attacks do. 'Heal' and 'Fix' but I can't be 'Healed' and 'Fixed' - at least like that- because there's nothing for me to return or be healed to. So it defaults to just...wiping me out of existence." she says. "I've been researching a lot of this extensively." she says. "Since then." she admits.
Amu Hinamori 2016-11-02 23:59:47 59512
Amu Hinamori nodded and closed her eyes, giving a shrug. "I... I see. I'm sorry. I never wanted to... I guess I said that. I'm happy we're doing better now, though. We're friends, right?" Then chuckled. "Though, I guess we have to be. If you wanted to off me, now'd be the best time. I can't even really get out of bed anymore."

She sighed. "I'm sorry I let it come to this. I'm so... stupid. I just get so... dumb sometimes. You know?"
Lacrima 2016-11-03 00:24:45 59517
Lacrima head tilts. "I should probably not feed on you right now. Besides, I'll be fine until late tomorrow." she says. She head tilts. "I'm... wiling to give you a chance. Because some people said I should give chances for people to help me." she says flatly.

"But every time I take advice- it has mostly backfired into my face." she says.

She sort of wraps her arms around herself, putting the empty bowl on the nightstand. (There is one. Right?).

She sighs a bit and just sulks. "It's not your fault. You know." she says. "That I'm like this? So it's not your problem." she says. "It's just upsetting, that people think it's 'so easy' just to do something different-- or feel different. Like Kukai demanding I feed only on those who 'deserve it'. It's not like I run into crime every night. Maybe twice a month? And I need to feed much more often than that." she says.
Amu Hinamori 2016-11-03 00:33:32 59520
Amu Hinamori nodded and reached out, putting a hand on her shoulder. "Well, I'll try not to backfire and... I know. it's easy to say 'just change' when you're not the one doing it. when you can just... assume the other person is weak, or stupid, or silly, or... anything else."

She patted her back. "I don't know what it's like. I can't know what it's like unless... well, you turned me. And I do NOT want to go down that path. Ever. So... instead I'll support and help you. Try to help you find others who can... feed you. I wish I could have done it myself but..."
Lacrima 2016-11-03 00:52:21 59528
Lacrima frowns. "I don't want to turn anyone, so that makes both of us." she says silently. She head tilts. "It hurts to be fed from that slowly that... someone's still awake when I'm done." she says. "Well. Mostly awake." she says.

"I don't... think you'll find many people. My... girlfriend. Offered." she says. "But. She's... also a purifier. I'm not sure if she'll 'hurt me' if I feed from her. I know... I didn't hurt when I fed from you. So. Maybe it's only specific people." she says.

She sighs a bit. "I dunno why she puts up with me." she says softly. "She knows I can't really... feel. Love... back." she says.
Amu Hinamori 2016-11-03 00:56:49 59529
Amu Hinamori nodded and then gave her one last hug. "Because she loves you and... you care about her. I know you like her. Want to protect her. Want her to be happy. Sometimes that's enough. Sometimes... those we care for don't feel the same way we do about them..." She leaned on her heavily, yawning a little and closing her eyes.

"It does hurt. But... I'll find others. Okay? Somehow... I just... I don't want you to have to mug people anymore. I want you to not have to hurt people. For oyu to have people you can count on. Like we do..." she said blearily.
Lacrima 2016-11-03 01:02:55 59531
Lacrima frowns and peers at Amu and sighs a bit and shakes her head. "I guess." she says quietly, because that's all she can muster about the situation. Amu seems to be ready to passout. She can catch that much as she purses her lips. "You seem to be falling asleep." she says softly.

"Maybe I outta let you get to bed." she says deadpanedly insistent.