Twisted Fairy Tale


A children's storybook is turned ''real'' by the child's wish that the stories were real! The Jewel Seed seekers get pulled in, and given the roles of various storybook and folklore characters as they figure a way out. CAUTION: Muffin Violence/Muffin Hostage Taking.

Date: 2017-10-21
Pose Count: 66
Nanoha Takamachi 2017-10-21 22:59:04 85209
There is a Jewel Seed active. It happened nearly twenty minutes ago and points to Penguin Park. It's active. Hilarously active. You can tell because there's a kid with a glowing storybook sitting against one of the trees and looks wonderously at a book of what appears to be Fairy Tales, Folk Tales and Fables. It's one of those thick anthology books. Regardless. He 'wooooows' to himself because words are twisting. Pictures are animating and---

"He--hey!" calls out a yelling Nanoha in barrier jacket. "Put that down! Don't---" she says as she's running spastically through the slowly dying grass going into fall...

There is a rush of energy!----- the world twists and turns around you and feel super weird..

Nanoha Takamachi was running madly towards a boy with an active jewel seed-infused story book a moment ago, wearing her barrier jacket.... and suddenly she's... skipping. Through a forest in a pretty red cloak with a hood. A very dense, attractive, nearly illustrated storybook forest that everyone else is suddenly also in. You can tell because there is also a retinue of singing birds to accompny her humming. But she suddenly opens her eyes wide and then stops and looks around suddenly scaring the birds. "W..what happened?" asks Little Red Riding Takamachi. "Raising Heart!?"

<< Here, Master. >> says Raising Basket, the basket in her hands. She blinks once and grimaces.

"W..wait where are we!?"

<< We are in a spatial distortion. >> says the Basket. Nanoha frowns and looks around. So.. they're trapped in a.. thing and she feesl weird.

"...Why do I feel a intense urge I need to visit my grandma." she says with wide eyes.

[OOC: You are now in a weird storybook world and are now a storybook character who probably feels they have some role to play in this story- whatever that may be. Finish the story, Expose the Jewel Seed.]
Kokoro Akakuma 2017-10-21 23:06:47 85210
    "Oi! Kid, no, that book's-!"

    Oops.

    It's a rare instance of getting to hear Kokoro Akakuma sound genuinely concerned for someone else's wellbeing, and seeing her charge in like a maniac. But they're just in time to be too late, and a flood of energy fills the world, blinding, overwriting reality and all her senses, and-

    When it clears, Kokoro blinks away the stars, looking around the forest with a frown. "...the hell? Was that thing supposed to make the kid feel like an adult or something? Everything's all little."

    No, Kokoro. Everything is not all little. It's more that, um...

    ...well, the flannel looks good on you.

    "...huh?" The magical girl frowns, swinging her axe onto her shoulder and looking downward at everyone else. "...why's everyone all little?"

    ...wait. Axe?
Fate Testarossa 2017-10-21 23:07:24 85211
    "It should be around here somewhere, Fate." Arf says as the two float over Penguin Park in search of the active signature.
    "Mn. Let's find it fast." The small blonde beside the wolf woman says. Then they see it.
    They see the child with the book by the Jewel Seed.
    This will not end well.
    "HEY KID GET AWAY FROM THAT." Arf shouts, she and Fate streak down from the sky, Fate already putting on speed as soon as Nanoha reveals herself...
    Then... Then everything changes.
    The next thing the Big Bad Wolf knows, is she's lurking in the forest, hiding in the bushes. Watching. Waiting. ... Clasping a hand over the snout of the tiny red wolf pup yapping beside her. "Hush, Arf." Fate whispers, Barrier Jacket now lined with fur and hide. Fingers flex in her golden-clawed gloves and blonde wolf-ears twitch as she frowns.
    "This is..."
    "This is weird! When did you get so big, Fate?!" Arf Yaps.
    Fate didn't get bigger. Arf just got turned into a puppy. So... Well. Fate is big by comparison.
    [Spatial anomaly, Sir.] Bardiche notes, explaining everything in two words as the three duck into the bushes and hush up before Nanoha arrives.
Rashmi Terios 2017-10-21 23:13:24 85212
"Oh no it's too l--" is all Rashmi manages to get out before reality warps.

Now garbed in a tattered dress and a coat made of moss and gold-thread, the dark-skinned redhead all but skips down the lane, a bundle slung over one shoulder bearing the tools of a respectable cook. A pace which slows, as realization sets in, and she looks down at herself in... confusion. Yes. "U-um.... okay what?"

The moss coat glows, traces of yellow light darting through the golden threads. << DIMENSIONAL SHIFT HAS OCCURRED, MASTER >>

"Apparently... Okay so where's the kid? And why am I wearing moss?"
Kukai Souma 2017-10-21 23:15:07 85213
Kukai Souma was spending an enjoyable evening in Penguin Park, half patrolling, half relaxing, carrying some takoyaki and munching on it as he walks along. Nothing happening, nothing going on, and even though most of his friends were out of town or busy, it was still a good day.

Then there was a sensation, prickling on the edge of his senses, and a sudden yell from nearby from a semi-familiar voice, full of panic and terror. Kukai's head comes up as he hears the sound, turning to face - a blast of magical energy, engulfing him!

Kintaro was spending an enjoyable day in the mountain forest, half patrolling, half relaxing, carrying some yakoyaki from his lunch and munching on it as he walked... along? Wait. This wasn't exactly right.

It took a moment for Kukai's panicked mind to surface through the persona of Kintaro, and he let out a little cry. "...What in the hell is going on here?!" He blinks, then takes an unsure step towards who he recognizes as both Nanoha and Red Riding Hood. "Where are we?"
A Siberian cat 2017-10-21 23:18:03 85215
From out of the underbrush beside Rashmi, a small and lone figure comes out.

As tall as a 15 lb cat can stand, in quite possibly the most dapper thigh-high boots that any feline could ever hope to find, comes Koji as he brushes some errant leaves and some other detritus from his gorgeously fluffed fur. With that big brushy tail of his sweeping back and forth behind him, the titular feline hero of french folklore looks around for a moment when the little blue gems on the snow leopard-engraved bucklestraps flash once.

Well... this is embarrassing.

Tilting his head to look up at all the others, the small form says, "What... just happened?"
Chris Yukine 2017-10-21 23:27:57 85219
Penguin Park was the last place to be sucked into any sort of time-space distortion madness, and yet. And yet, here she was, watching some boy stare at his book with wonder. A small annoyance, rather compunded by being swallowed up by the maelstrom born by his hand, nary a second passing by before jolting in place, keenly aware of the...the strangeness about her.

Regal, yet comfortable. An outfit meant for royal hunting, yet one aligned towards the practicalities of the peasentry. A red and white motif throughout, it would take not amoment to note the new clothes that was on her persona, looking at them in nothing short of surprise. "Huh!? What's this!?" The wordsof that talking basket barely registered in her mind, more concerned with the dual pistols slung on her belt and the general...Situation at hand.

A small part of her mind was thankful that she ate before this. Another part had an urge to hunt.
A Strange Fox 2017-10-21 23:31:16 85220
Jiaying Maki was at the park with her sketch book, sitting near the water and in general enjoying the weekend. That's when things go weird. There's a steady stream of frustrated Chinese as she stands up, trying to figure out who's ruining a perfectly fine afternoon. She brushes herself off a few times, she suddenly stops, looks around again and asks flatly, "What happened now?" ... "It wasn't me." She immediately offers. Not that she's ever been accused of doing any such thing. There's an intense desire to avoid having something pinned on her though.

She looks to the others, noting the hunter, the mark. Victim... Red Riding Hood. The hunter though, that's one she wants pointed elsewhere. She's taken on the role of a completely different kind of fox. Which will later probably be the source of some complaint.
Nanoha Takamachi 2017-10-21 23:39:24 85225
Red Riding Raising Heart looks around and purses her lips as she frowns. "I'm Red Riding Hood I guess." she says trying to look up at the red hood. She looks down at the basket and opens it and there is a BOUNTY of muffins in there. So she closes it. She looks up and-- oh god, is that Kokoro and she's even way way taller than usual.

"KOKORO-CHAN. CAN YOU SEE OVER THE TREES!? DO YOU SEE A HOUSE IN THE DISTANCE!?" she asks as she looks back over to Rashmi's outfit, and down to... Koji-In-Boots and there's. Kuktaro. and. She doesn't know many other folktalkes but she's assuming everyone is some from folk tale or fairy tale right now.

She eyes Jiaying with a blink. "No. You didn't do it. Some. Jewel Seed infused book did. We were in the park and now we are not." she mutters.

She eyes the path and turns to it and starts walking. "I think we outta keep going." she says.

<< Affirmative. >> replies the basket.

"...How many muffins are inside you?" she asks Raising Heart.

<< 26. >> says Basket Heart.

"....I wonder if gramma would miss just one..." she says. "Probably not a good idea to eat weird Jewel Seed manifested muffins" she then adds.

A pause. "Why do I suddenly feel lost." a pause. Indeed. It's like the scenery just changed when no one was looking. It's a little darker. and the forest is denser. But not ultra so.

"....if only.... there was a short cut." she blurts out. Because it feels like she's supposed to.

Then she waits.

Something is supposed to happen. When she says that. Right? Help.. of some sort? A lead... in the right direction?
Fate Testarossa 2017-10-21 23:44:02 85226
    MEANWHILE, IN THE BUSHES.
    "Faaaaaaaate... I'm really hungry." Arf whines, pointing a finger at open mouth and holding her tummy.
    Fate cringes at the tiny. puppy-girl's whining, her own stomach suddenly snarling.
    "I know, Arf. Me too."
    It's a sad state of affairs, two young wolves in the wild, a tiny pack starving. Willing to do anything for their next Jewel Seed.
    Fate's ears perk and twitch, tail swishing as she gets an idea. "Arf. Go on ahead."
    This is when Big Bad Fate emerges from the trees.
    She says nothing as she glowers at all the others. And points in the direction opposite Grandma's house while Arf scampers that way.
Kokoro Akakuma 2017-10-21 23:51:00 85230
    And there's a Kintaro. And a Red Riding Hood. And... and... oh god.

    "...I turned into some American fairy tale or something, didn't I?"

    Kokoro looks over her axe with a frown. Strangely, the axe-head has those same pattersn along it her hammer usually does. But that's about it. "Hang on, lemme see if..." she replies to Nanoha, trailing off as she lifts herself up, straining, and.... "...Ugh. I can /kinda/ see a ways, but I can't see a house or anything. Too thick around here. Too many tree-"

    Kokoro stops in her verbal tracks. She looks at the trees. She looks at her axe. She looks at the trees again.

    As Fate takes a step out from the trees, the tree RIGHT NEXT TO HER abruptly shakes with a stupendous, monstrous impact. By sheer luck it is the first tree Kokoro Bunyan picks to start chopping down. "RAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
Kukai Souma 2017-10-21 23:51:58 85231
Kuktaro grumbles and crosses his arms, popping the last of the takoyaki into his mouth and trying not to be annoyed. "Great. I hate these things, they always cause the most crazy problems to happen. All right, well, I'm here to be part of the story, I assume, so if you're lost, I imagine I am too." He scratches the back of his head, looking around the forest for the moment. "But part of me says that I grew up here, and these forests are my home and have been for years. I'm friend to every animal up here." He eyes Puss In Boots for a moment. "All of them I know, at least. So there has to be a way for us to get where we have to go, and fast."

Kuktaro frowns for a moment, focusing, and then looks into one pocket. A little Guardian Chara wearing what can only be described as a cartoon carp suit sticks his head back out, and whines. "Kukai, this place makes my head hurt..."
Rashmi Terios 2017-10-21 23:52:12 85232
".....Wait, twenty-six?" Mossycoat says as she approachs Riding Heart, head tilting to one side. ".....How many J-" And she cuts off, as the Fate-est werewolf there ever did Fate lumbers out from the trees. One hand claps over her mouth, because sometimes it's just *mean* to laugh.

And then Koko Bunyan activates.

Truly this is a dire time to be stifling the giggles.
A Strange Fox 2017-10-21 23:55:59 85233
Jiaying Maki sees the muffins. That's free lunch. Maybe she can snag some free lunch, pin it on whoever's really causing the problems with the park. Maybe she could even get the hunter pointed at her uncle. That gets her off scott free, puts a headache there and scores a free lunch. She pauses for a few moments, looking down, then behind herself. She's got the wrong color hair, her tail's the wrong color. Those thoughts are a touch out of whack. "I'm not eating fried tofu!" which means she's completely whiffed on the guess for what she's become in this twisted story.

That said, she does try to sneak a hand towards the basket to steal a muffin while everyone is talking. Even while she's staring at the rather big lumberjack. Then there's a werewolf. She looks around the group, back to the werewolf. Back to the group. "I don't recognize any of you." she finally states confidently.
Chris Yukine 2017-10-22 00:00:11 85234
Strangers in a strange land, blinking in a state of confusion as she took a few breaths to collect herself together. "Fairy tales, fairy tales...Ah, I don't know any of them!" Being part of a traveling family had its downsides, after all. Striding right up to the congregating group, her eyes flicker from one abnormal character to the next, trying to burn them into memory...including the giant axe-wielding maniac above them.

"Right, so..." Closing her eyes for a few moments, the fake memories washed over her. "I'm meant to kill a dragon that disguises itself as a bunny. A water-mill should be its hiding spot, which should be..." Close enough, even if she had this strangely vague sense of where to go. A finger pointed in an arbitrary yet fitting direction, relying on the magical knowledge gifted to her! "...There. I think. Who are you all, anyways?" Let's...Let's just ignore the wolves in the back for now while taking a single step away from the Maniac Tree Chopper. Guns are a good deterrent, right?
A Siberian cat 2017-10-22 00:03:52 85236
*HWAR*

The cobbled cat looks like he's about to put out a hairball.

*HWAR*

Once more he tightens that scritchable belly and his neck stretches out forwards, tongue even coming out.

*HWAR*

The third gesture causes him to bend forwards slightly and suddenly he does a rather proper and dapper little bow to the rather large lupine before the group, and suddenly the finely footed feline rises up to say to The Big Bad Feito-Chain...

"Excusei-Moi Mademoisselle Loup. I must say your fur looks ravishing this day, and your teeth so pearly... like the curls of the waterfalls of the Alps."

Yes. The catte is speaking French, or at least Frenchly.

"We are but poor lost travelers, and hope that you would render assistance. If you could possibly, Si vou plais, assist us by scouting ahead with our large axe-wielding friend above, we might help to find my Mistress' abode?"

Pretty-Kitty eyes engaged, "I am sure Mademoiselle Raising Heart would spare you a muffin or three for your troubles? They were only baked this morning, and are sweet with the fruits on ete."

Koj-in-Boots steps back from his offer, and waits, paws in paws.
Nanoha Takamachi 2017-10-22 00:13:55 85238
Nanoha huffs "NO MUFFINS. They're for Grammma-----wait. I don't have a gramma." she taps her bottom lip. "Do I?" she asks. She shakes her head. "I think we need to accomplish one of these goals to show the Jewel Seed. I'm not seeing any dragons. But I know Gramma's house is over there...." she points right. But then left. Then Right and---

The Fatest Wolf ever shows up. She purses her lips and while Fate doesn't speak. She eyes the direction. "That way.... Big Bad Fate-chan?" she asks. That puppy? What's that puppy about? She doesn't knooooow.

Oh god Kokoro-chan what are you doing? "I bet. You want to chop down the whole forest." she laments as she look over to Rashmi. She begins walking in the way Fate pointed her.

"Let's go. If anyone sees their goal then maybe we should go after it. Or senses it.. or.."

Raising Heart pings. << Dimensional Disturbance must have a trigger shut off. Goal completetion may be as good as any other. >>
Fate Testarossa 2017-10-22 00:23:50 85239
    Fate's not that big. She's just big by comparison to tiny little Arf, who... Is headed in the REAL direction of granny's house. While Fate lies through her teeth to the others.
    Though she jerks slightly as Kokoro goes right for the tree she was standing beside.
    Her gaze focuses on Rashmi. The wolf is glowering. She can hear that struggle to quell the giggles.
    
    "Stop." She says quite simply to Koj-in-Boots. Tempting as a muffin sounds, she wants something more... Substantial. And she has Arf to think about. "It's that way."
    She's adamant on the direction she's pointing. Because she's going to try and get there before everyone else once they start going that way, anyway.
Kokoro Akakuma 2017-10-22 00:29:54 85241
    Kokoro keeps on swingin', and with her mighty thews, that tree isn't going to stay up very long. As soooooon as it starts to teeter, she's right there, and catches it over one shoulder. CreaaaaaakWHUD.

    Then she turns her head towards Nanoha. "Huh? ...no, not really. Just seemed like the thing to do. Guess we ain't got time to just carve our way through, though." The towering lumbermahou pauses for a moment, then peers at Fate, then adds, "...I'm keepin' this tree, though." She hefts the felled tree up onto her shoulder, then starts walking in Fate's indicated direction.

    "You know, if I were the big bad wolf, I'd be givin' bad directions, so's the heroes got lost or somethin'. We really oughta be going this way?" And yet, she's still walking.
Rashmi Terios 2017-10-22 00:31:32 85242
The look that Rashmi gives back to Fate can only be described as 'I'm sorry *but can you blame me?!*' When she finally trusts herself to speak, she lowers her hand, clearing her throat. ".........Thank you, Wolf," she says, her voice tremulous, as she falls into step with the rest. Looking up at Kokoro, she lifts a shoulder. "Probably you're right," she says, "but that's how the story goes, right?"
Kukai Souma 2017-10-22 00:35:02 85244
Kuktaro watches Kokoro for a moment, chopping at the trees, then nudges her. Even a nudge from him is fairly stiff. "Hey, what are you going to do with them when they're chopped, huh? C'mon, let it be for a moment." He looks back over to Big Bad Fate and his eyes narrow - that's one wolfgirl he's never seen before. Of course, there's a lot of stuff going on here he's never seen before. "Yeah. How do we know we can trust her? She's kinda shady looking." Which is funny, because she's probably more blonde-furred.

Kuktaro does, however, see the rest of the group heading in the direction she's pointing and sighs, following her. He does stop to eye Koj-In-Boots. "Can you keep up or do you need a lift?"
Chris Yukine 2017-10-22 00:37:17 85245
A small huff burst forth from her nostrils, shaking her head at the insanity of the situation. Of course the wolf would give bad directions! Anyone getting called Big and Bad definitely deserved to have their instructions mistrusted. Yet, she was already walking along, resigning herself to the situation at hand. The story had to be followed. Story, story, story... "Yeah, thanks for the direction. You haven't seen any hares on the way here, would you?" Her usual shyness was overwhelmed by the situation at hand, following the lead of the story dictated in her head. "Hare turns into a dragon, then BANG! For the emperor, anyways." Still, she was out here for game, not for leading some girl to her grandma. Keeping herself alert, the daughter of the Emperor kept her wits about. Vewry, vewry quiet.
A Strange Fox 2017-10-22 00:40:05 85246
Jiaying Maki is wary of the wolf. Sure it's not Ysengrim, but that doesn't mean she has to trust them. Muffin in hand, she begins to slip away from the others. They're going to do something... something important right? There's a French cat. Why does that seem familiar. Was that a fighting game character? Her head tilts as she tries to remember. Bite of a muffin later, she calls out in similar language, "Where's the wolf going Boots?" What, it's a cat in boots. That works right?

Reyjing considers her bet. Stay with the wolf, the food and the cover-people, or maybe try to figure out what they're really after and see if she can snatch it first. "You can never trust a wolf. My uncle's a nuisance." Which is an understatment. The currently red-haired girl crosses her arms. Beat. "I'm going the other way." She states firmly. "She's probably trying to lead us to Ysengrim and that only works once." She picks the opposite direction. After trying to snatch one more muffin with her tail. Maybe two. She'd consider it a victory to get any spare though.
A Siberian cat 2017-10-22 00:41:14 85247
He's just a little kitty with itty bitty boots, so for every single step anyone else takes, he has to do four or five. Practically trotting along with the others, the offer of assistance by Kuktaro causes him to give a magnificent feline leap up and to land daintily on the stranger's shoulders, now settled more like a regular cat.

"Merci mon ami, it may be a race, and she may be our ennemi amical, but we should always be polite, non?"

Then he leaps off of Kuktaro's shoulders and begins using those trees to keep up, "Mes Amies, we all have the powers of our tales on our side, and in the tales the heroine always wins the day! Think of who you are, what you do, saisis tes reves!"

"And to find a hare, I shall! Perhaps your ami du dragon will assist us in our quest!" He declares and begins leaping gamely from branch to branch, working his way around the huge Ko Bunyan as he searches for that little bit of someone else's fairy tale.
Tin Soldier 2017-10-22 01:00:43 85252
After everyone else scampers on toward the inevitable conclusion's predestined destination...

Behind Fate and Arf, there's a tinny-sounding voice that's tired and incredibly put-upon, and perhaps a little out of breath. "Sorry I'm late. Hopping is really very slow."

NO ONE THERE?!

But wait, the voice was coming from down there--

And down there's Jin, then, approximately four inches tall. He has a rifle with a bayonet held in one hand and leaning against his shoulder, and a tall hat, and a neat and perfectly straightened and aligned red jacket with shiny gold buttons and white trim and a black holster belt, navy blue uniform trousers, and--

--his bad leg is literally cut off at the knee, the remaining one attached to a metal stand which must be how he's remaining balanced and upright. He's grimacing.

"I checked," he says, sotto voce, "I can at least still use my spells. I just can't fly. Perhaps it would be best if you carried me. I apologize for the inconvenience."
Nanoha Takamachi 2017-10-22 01:17:46 85256
Red Riding Takamachi blinks at Jia-still-a-fox-no-matter-what as she has a .. muffin!? "Raising Heart, how many muffins now!?" she asks.

<< 25. >> it replies.

"I said don't eat the muffins!" she insists. She sighs and blinks back to Fate. Or where she might had been because she's trying to beat them there. Not that she knows that.

"....I dunno, that wolf seemed very trustworthy." she says. Wait. Did she even see who the wolf was?

Is this world clouding her head? "So don't be silly." she says as she continues down the wolf aligned path.

"If anyone feels they can find their um...." a pause. "What was I talking about again?"

Oh dear. This story is affecting her yes.

<< Completed goals may expose the Jewel Seed. >> Raising Heart basket spits out.

"Right!" she says with widened eyes of recognition!

She eyes Koku-Bunyun and Koktaru and Chris. "Well she chops trees! It's what she does!" she says. "And-- a hare? That turns into a dragon?" she eyes the forest. Any hares? Any bushes rustling. She follows along the path.

There is another change. It happens between eye blinks for everyone or when you're not paying attention /again/. It's much much later. They are in front of a small idlyic forest house in a small glade and it's VERY Dark now.

"Oh! We're here! But that took a lot longer than I thought it was... we were walking for a long time..."

A pause. "Right?..."

No. Not long at all.
Fate Testarossa 2017-10-22 01:18:04 85257
    Are they buying it? It looks like Little Red is at least, though in spite of the open distrust towards her and her directions from the others, Fate... Turns right around.
    The little tin man is scooped right up en passant, and settled on Fate's shoulder. "Hold on."
    It's the only warning he's getting before the blonde drops to all fours and starts loping at top speed' through the trees. And she is fast''. Inhumanly so.
    MEANWHILE. AT GRANNY'S HOUSE.
    "Helloooooo? Is anyone home? I'm coming in! Do you have any ramen?!" Arf has one thing on her mind and it is her stomach as she lets herself in. "Helloooooo?"
    And finds... "Oh man that bed looks so comfy!"
    Two things on her mind as she just... Crawls right into the bed for a nap.
Kokoro Akakuma 2017-10-22 01:19:34 85258
    "Yeah, yeah, I know," Kokoro grumbles in reply to Kukai. "...I'm still keepin' this one, though." She does, indeed, keep that tree over her shoulder as she goes sauntering into the forest, but just as the house shows itself, the towering lumbermahou stops, and... frowns. "...no, hang on. This ain't right. We're missin' someone. I got a... a buddy. A buddy we oughta have here." And she turns and goes wandering off into the forest, in search of...

    "Oi, partner, where are ya? Oi! C'mon, y'big dumb ox, we got work to do! Oooooi!"
Rashmi Terios 2017-10-22 01:24:27 85259
"Nano-chan, we really weren't," Rashmi tries to insist... though it's a half-hearted effort at best, as Kokoro just lumberjacks off in search of her partner.

So many questions.

"Okay so if we're supposed to complete goals, and we're going to your grandma's house, then we're probably going to find a wolf in the bed...."
Tin Soldier 2017-10-22 01:27:56 85261
There is the world's tiniest, tinniest squeak of alarm as Jin's rifle-free hand grabs hold of wolf-Fate's fuzzy shoulder, and then he just hangs on for dear life. Somewhere, Osiemnastka is laughing helplessly.
A Strange Fox 2017-10-22 01:28:53 85262
Jiaying Maki looks down at the muffin she liberated. Back to Nanoha Hood. Back to the muffin. Then she takes a great big bite. Hides it behind her back and asks, "Wut?" She's stopped from getting too far away by the distraction at least. There's a big foreboding house there suddenly. There's a scowl from the trickster-y sort. Her head tilts to one side, then the other. "Blue ox..?" She asks, trying to imagine the idea. "Why is it blue though?" She asks, taking a moment to finish her muffin before heading straight towards the house. She's loking at the windows, the doors, around back. Paths in and out. Her head peeks around the corner in time to catch Rashmi's description. Which prompts the question, "Why would you have a wolf in your bed?" Frown, "I wouldn't want a wolf anywhere near my bed. I'd have lead them away. Maybe into a bigger critter to spook it off."

Poor girl has no idea what most of the characters present are. Luckily, her mind is mostly just getting whatever she happens to want and avoid getting anything pinned on her. Pointing inside, she says, "If it's a wolf in there though, maybe we could get the big'n to lead the way. Would be safer right?"
Kukai Souma 2017-10-22 01:31:31 85263
Kuktaro doesn't really pay much attention to Koj In Boots hopping up onto him or off his shoulders, still following Big Bad Fate and the others. "Well the goal is.. ah..." He rubs his head. "I guess getting to your grandmother's house is as good as anything else. I'm just watching for a monster that's supposed to be in this area. Something like that. So that direction is fine." He walks along, listening to Nanoha Hood's basket talk. That's the right thing to do. His head's foggy right now anyway.

There's a moment, and then it's later that night, and they're standing near a large house. "Well if a wolf wanted to get into your bed, are you going to argue with it? And they're warm and as long as they're fed they're actually pretty friendly. There are wolves on the mountain, I've met them before." Kuktaro rubs his chin as well, peering at the house. "Why are all the windows dark, though? Is noone home?"
Chris Yukine 2017-10-22 01:32:25 85264
"Yeah! A hare! That turns into a dragon! Though if there's anything else worth shooting, point me at it! No reason to giveup some game for the thing that took my brothers." She was oddly nonchalant about the implications involved, blinking a few times as she continued followwing the mass of people along. One blink. Two. Three. Four. Night.

Wait, night? "...Nighttime already? That can't be right..." That was the primary thought in her mind, frowning as the emperor's daughter tried to best collect her thoughts. Night meant...Night meant...Something. Game heading home. Should she return home? Not yet, not when there was the possibility of game afoot. "If there's a wolf in there, let me lead point." A gesture to her sidearms as she strode to the front of the group, gazing at the door. A mismatched memory born of fairy tales, grumbling to herself. Even if she didn't find the hare, bringing back game would make this day trip worth it!

"Your count, Red Hood."
A Siberian cat 2017-10-22 01:33:15 85265
Rather than try and stay with the group after a fruitless search for a rabbit... any rabbit... that might in fact actually be a dragon, Koj-in-Boots instead uses his feline speed to get off towards the cottage as quickly as he can. Moving around to the back, he looks for a mouse hole that he can use to sneak into the house first to make sure it's safe.

To do this, he needs to take off his most excellent boots. Boots that say in a mostly familiar tone, I will meet the others!

So as Koji attempts to infiltrate the tiny abode, his Boots tromp their way back around front and click their heels to attention as the others approach!
Nanoha Takamachi 2017-10-22 01:44:09 85266
Kokoro goes bounding off to look for a big blue ox. Nanoha blinks like this is a completely normal occurance! "Okay! Maybe that's your goal!" she calls out. She eyes Jiaying and makes a grumpy frown face. Stealing muffins! Who would do such a horrible thing!?

Jiaying apparently, in this storybook.

She eyes Chris and Kuktaro and purses her lips a bit. Also those blue birds have left a long while ago that were following her. She eyes Koji-in-boots. What is he doing? Does he know something she doesn't? Surely. Gramma is in this idylic forest cabin just fine as Nanoha creeeeks it open.

There's probably some old timey oil lamp or candle lighting the cabin as she creeps up. "Gramma?" she asks around. "Gramma I'm here, sorry I'm---"

She walks into the bedroom to find something small, and with tiny ears there. and maybe also grabbed Gramma's sleeping cap at some point or not. Regardless. Nanoha seems VERY convinced this is her gramma.

"Gramma, what furry ears you have!" she says with wide eyes.

Seriously? Yes- seriously!

But where's Fate-chan!?
Rashmi Terios 2017-10-22 01:46:30 85267
Pausing next to the disembodied boots, Rashmi blinks down. "I.... wait..... Tyrfing?" Of course it's Tyrfing. If Koji becomes a cat whose most notable feature is his boots, it stands to perfect reason that Tyrfing is the boots. "Where's Koji-kun, and how much trouble is Nanoha in? ....Scratch that, how much trouble is Fate-san going to be in when she realizes our woodsman is the size of Tokyo Tower?"
A Siberian cat 2017-10-22 01:51:12 85268
The Boots attempt to reply, but since they're not at one with their Master there's just a shuffling of them, and then a couple taps on the ground before they attempt a pantomime of sneaking on their tips to one side and then another.

In the meantime... Kojicatte sneaks cloooser and cloooser to the bedding, moving with all the stealthiness of a feline, tail in the air and flicking back and forth before stilling once.
Fate Testarossa 2017-10-22 01:54:10 85269
    The tiny figure in the bed rolls over and curls up. "Nnnuuh... The better to hear you with. You're loud." Arf whines. She had just started to doze off.
    Meanwhile back outside, Fate comes to a halt. Having taken the actual shortcut, she beat the others, technically. But decided to not enter the house. Here, waiting and watching from the bushes she observes.
    "When they're all inside..." She says to the tiny tin soldier on her shoulder, "I'm going to huff and puff the house down. Then you move in and take the muffins."
    What a dastardly plan.
Tin Soldier 2017-10-22 01:59:38 85270
The tiny tiny tin soldier salutes Fate smartly, straightening up. He inches forward, then jumps down and jams his bayonet into the dirt beside the foundation of the cabin and hangs on, bracing for the huffing and puffing. He clears his throat and practices lines on himself, mouthing the words as if testing them for usability. 'These muffins are now the property of--' no no no 'I claim these--' naaaah 'Surrender your--'...

He's not entirely sure yet how he's going to enforce his action, but he's certain he can pull it off! Fate has faith in him!
Chris Yukine 2017-10-22 02:02:56 85271
She leaned in alongside Nanoha, following along slightly behind the girl into the dark cottage, eyes narrowing at the sight of the mysterious...thing on the bed. It was a...definitely not a grandma. That much was certain, but she couldn't really tell...After all, the other was calling her Gramma. Maybe it was something that she liked to do? Play pranks? "Uh...Uhm...Pleased to meet you, Red Hood's gramma...?" Maybe having her pistols brandished (and practicing proper trigger discipline) wasn't the best idea with so many people around.
Rashmi Terios 2017-10-22 02:05:34 85272
"Kind of a bit late for that," Rashmi murmurs, scooping up Tyrfing (and his platform heels, seriously?) "It looks like Nanochan's already got the story moving along. Just..... I seriously hope Kokochan doesn't smash her flat, that'd be hard to talk Nanochan through.
A Siberian cat 2017-10-22 02:12:30 85273
In the story, there's an entire litany that has to be observed with 'Grandma' and Little Red Raising Heart. A nice back and forth in order to establish the tension and the mood.

But there is a cat in the room. They defy scripting.

So in the middle of Arf whining and forgetting her part, 15 lbs of fuzzy Russian-bred feline LEAPS into the air and lands right atop of Arf, giving off a yowling hiss before yelling out, "Alarme! Alarme! Elle n'est pas une elle, elle est un loup!"

What's really helpful in this case is as the cat cries out... IN FRENCH... subtitles appear below the cat to say...

-She is not a she, she is a wolf!-

The boots in Rashmi's grip try and wriggle out of her grasp, those (yes yes, they're platform) heels accidentally bumping her once as they try and return to their courageous and canny cat companion!
Kokoro Akakuma 2017-10-22 02:21:43 85274
    Meanwhile, the yelling off somewhere in the near distance has stopped. There's a few moments of silence.

    There's a TREMENDOUS CRASH.

    There's more silence.

    And then there is a slow, rumbling thud-thud-thud, like the sound of huge hooves thudding into the ground slowly and steadily. Thud thud thud thud thud. There are probably glimpses of blue through the trees.
Kukai Souma 2017-10-22 02:24:40 85275
Kuktaro marches into the house along with the others, staying outside of the bedroom as the rest of the group goes in to find Nanoha Hood's grandmother. That's a good thing to do - at the very least, this has been a really confusing situation, and he's not been the most helpful so far.

There's yelling from inside the bedroom, and Kuktaro pulls open the door (accidentally pulling it part of the way off the hinges), staring at the subtitled cat. "What's going on in here?!"
Nanoha Takamachi 2017-10-22 02:29:05 85276
Nanoha Takamachi opens her mouth in surprise as she places her hands to her face, basket under her elbow hanging there. "But , Gramma! What a squeaky voice yo---" then there is a subtitled cat? "Of course she is a she! She's a she wolf!" she says wagging a finger. Nanoha Takamachi probably doesn't get French methods of speech.

Then there is a thud sound. in the distance which distracts her even more before she looks back to Arf who isn't gramma after all.

She's a little preoccupied suddenly!

It's probably the storybook world's doing.

"W...what's going on out there." she says with wide eyes to both, Chris and Kuktaro.
Fate Testarossa 2017-10-22 02:36:17 85277
    "The better to tell you to let me slee-- WAH! AH! AH! GET IT OFF GET IT OFF!"
    Arf really just wanted to roll back over. Then the poor hungry pup has a cat leaping on the bed to wake her up.
    As cats do.
    There is a long moment of panic and flailing under the sheets as she battles Kojicat, growling and tangling up in the sheets, but that very much is a tiny wolf.
    On the other hand, from the outside- aside from Kokoro- that looks like everyone is in the cottage. "Get ready..." The bigger bad wolf whispers to the tiny tin man. Because Fate draws a breath. Then breathes it out slowly... She draws in a deeper breath... Then out slowly... A third time and--- She nearly chokes when something deep in the woods crashes, making her turn her head, eyes gleaming and ears perked.
    What was that?
    She waits a long moment... Before returning to huffing... And puffing, building up her breath and strength, oblivious to the blue threat in the woods.
    But back inside, Arf manages to extricate herself from the tangled mess and LUNGES at Nanoha. She snatches and snarls and tumble-rolls away, backed into a corner as she holds up a stolen muffin to her mouth, threateningly.
    "NOBODY MOVE A MUSCLE OR THE MUFFIN GETS IT!"
Rashmi Terios 2017-10-22 02:39:44 85278
"What a big idea you have," Rashmi sighs, putting the shoes down, looking among all the rest of the spectators. "So hey um, Nanochan, quick question. How many Jewel Seeds are there in total? I meant to ask earlier, and right now it seems extra important."
A Siberian cat 2017-10-22 02:42:40 85279
Despite his valiant efforts, Koj-sans-Boots is wrapped up in blanket and tossed to one side on the floor as Arf lunges towards Nanoha and her basket of muffins. There's whirly bit of feline tail and paws trying to get free as the boots tromp over to try and help...

Which consists of the boots just tapping on the floor, ignoring the potential hostage situation.

And a single mournful yowl comes from the pile of bedding and paws going in every direction.
Kokoro Akakuma 2017-10-22 02:46:00 85281
    The forest parts. It really has no choice in the matter, at this point. When a big blue ox with a big red lumbermahou sitting on it comes ambling on out, there is not much a tree can do but get out of the way. Of course, with all the noise and astride such a large beast, Kokoro really doesn't have the best view of what's going on at ground level. "Hey." Pat pat pat. "Stop right over there." The ox moos obligingly (though perhaps a bit irritably?) and turns slightly, its heavy hoofbeats taking it on a slow and steady path that goes directly over the Little Bad Fate. Oh, this could be... wait no, it's going past her.

    Almost, anyway. It stops juuuuust past Fate, such that she could look up and see a huge ox tail. Kokoro herself looks around once or twice, then reaches over and pats the ox's head. "I'm gonna head in. You see some blonde wolf girl, you make a lotta noise, alright?" Moo. "Good. Now, sit."

    And, obligingly, Babe the huge blue ox sits, so that Kokoro can hop off.

    Of course, Babe cannot see where he is parking his colossal bovine backside. But Fate can. It's kind of hard not to.
Tin Soldier 2017-10-22 02:47:43 85282
--oh. OH. Oh no, Arf has a muffin-- oh it's only a muffin-- but there's a THREAT, and Fate is--

"Testarossa-san! There is a HUMONGOUS THREAT approaching! I hear your model actress wolf friend with the muffin situation in hand; I shall play to my strengths, as initially discussed!" the tiny toy soldier on the ground next to the house yells in his high tinny voice. "Don't worry, my friend, I have your back! I will make you proud!"

And the bitty one-legged most steadfast of tin soldiers grimly hops away from Fate in the direction of the massive disturbance in the woods.

Hop hop hop hop hop hop

hop hop hop

hop hop HOP HOP HOP HOP

hop hop *pant pant* hop hop hop

and he STANDS HIS GROUND between the approaching giant and the house, holding up his rifle; he fires a warning shot over Ko Bunyan's shoulder with a little *POF*, roughly the size of a grain of sand. "HALT!" his itsy voice shrieks. "I CHALLENGE YOU TO AN HONOR DUEL! AS FATE TESTAROSSA'S CHAMPION, IT IS MY RIGHT!!"
Chris Yukine 2017-10-22 02:58:08 85283
At this point, the straight-headed side of Chris was protesting futilely at this strange turn of events, raising both pistols to keep pointed at Arf, furrowing her brow slightly as her lips curved into a grin. Fresh game, ripe for the taking! The hunt was certainly something special, considering the strange way the game had revealed itself! "Alriiight, little wolf. Nice and easy. Drop the muffin. Though Father will be pleased if I bring back a fresh catch for the night..." She had forgotten about the hare completely...
Kukai Souma 2017-10-22 03:15:29 85284
Kuktaro watches Arf reach in and grab a muffin. "Hey! That's stealing - don't take what she's got for her grandmother! What do you think you're doing?!" He growls but doesn't move forward, seeing Chris and the others pinning the wolfgirl in the corner. There's a breeze and some very strange sounds coming from outside, though, so Kuktaro replaces the door as best he can and moves back to the front door, looking out. "Kokoro, anything going on out here?"
Nanoha Takamachi 2017-10-22 03:18:29 85285
Nanoha looks to Rashmi. "I uh." she blinks rapidly. "I don't know?" nrg, she wishes Yuuno was here. She isn't herself right now. She can't answer questions like that, that aren't about muffins and going to gramma's house. Ugh! Maybe it's her age compared to the others.

"Oh no! She's got a muffin!" she says with EXTRA worry in her voice!

"Please don't hurt it!" she begs Arf as--- a cat mrowls and she looks back to the bed.

"Koji-in-boots?" she asks with wide eyes.

She looks back to Arf as Chris threatens her. "What!?" she exclaims.
Kokoro Akakuma 2017-10-22 03:27:08 85286
    Still utterly oblivious, Kokoro is sliding down off her titanic ox and heading towards the house when a tiny thing fires a tiny bullet. She doesn't even notice it going over her shoulder, but the tiny firecracker POP gets her attention.

    It takes her a moment to find him, though. He'd be tiny at her normal size! "...huh?" Blink blink. That... that's a very tiny little dude down there. "Oi, you really wanna... well, alright, sure." With a shrug, Kokoro just slings her axe off her shoulder, hauls it way up overhead, and then brings it down in a mighty swing. Folk tales will be told about that swing. It will probably end up in a Disney movie.
Tin Soldier 2017-10-22 03:33:49 85287
That MIGHTY AXE comes SWINGING DOWN directly upon the brave tin soldier, who raises his tiny rifle and bayonet to parry! This can't possibly end...

...well...

...except that he's actually doing it, with a shining wild glittering light surrounding him and the axe head both as he strains his muscles and is brought to his only knee, his foot coming partially unfixed from the square metal base it's welded to. "YOU'RE A BIG BULLY FOR PICKING ON TESTAROSSA-SAN!" he yells in that ridiculous voice, pushing with all his might and magic--

And then fmph, he's driven into the forest floor by the sheer strength of Kokoro Bunyan and the weight of her incredible axe.

There's even a little burst of leaves.

When she starts pulling the axe out of the ground, the toy soldier is clinging to it with steadfast determination, stabbing at it with his ickle bayonet. Ping! Ping! Pingpingpingping! Tink! Ping! Tinktinktink! Ping!
Rashmi Terios 2017-10-22 03:35:31 85288
"Hey hey HEY!" Rashmi shouts, grabbing hold of Chris' shoulder. "No! We do not shoot Familiars!" Shifting around to plkace herself between CHris and Arf, she looks over her shoulder. "Arf-san, you do know this story ends with the hunter killing the Big Bad Wolf, right? I really don't think anyone actually wants that..."
A Siberian cat 2017-10-22 03:37:00 85289
The Boots walk over to Kuktaro, kick him in the shin, and then walk back to the pile in the blanket, and the second mournful yowl of the cat stuck in the blankets still!

*taptaptaptaptaptap*
Fate Testarossa 2017-10-22 03:43:56 85290
    Arf has a muffin and she KNOWS how to use it. Though a wolf is most dangerous when cornered, the pup is looking ready to do something drastic with that muffin, regardless of the fact that it's for Nanoha's questionably existing grandmother.
    Then... Then Chris presents the wolf with a threat. "Wuh...?"
    Back outside though, Fate looks up. To see a big blue ox lumbering along to settle its big blue butt on her. Scarlet eyes shoot wide open in a moment of utter horror, she definitely stops huffing, and there's no more puffing. What happens next is a sheer fluke of pure coincidence as she LEAPS out of the path of being sat on at the very last second--
    And inside, Arf's knees are knocking, the tiny pup's eyes are watering as big bad hunter Chris is forgets the hare. "I DON'T KNOW THIS STORY AT ALL!" She yelps at Rashmi. It... Makes sense considering she's a wolf from space. But then she loses all composure and bolts, leaping through the nearest window with a smash of glass and--
    Right into Fate's arms. Fate, who decides this has gone for far too long, and will settle for the muffin as she wheels around, holding Arf in one arm, one hand snatching at her tiny tin compatriot at an opportune moment after the most epic parry of all time- to bolt into the woods, tail between legs.
Tin Soldier 2017-10-22 03:46:02 85291
As Fate nopes out, that same tiny voice can be heard protesting woefully, "I HAD HER ON THE ROCKS! I mean actually thank you--"
Rashmi Terios 2017-10-22 03:47:56 85292
The tiny, tinny voice gives Rashmi pause, as she stares out the now-broken window. "....Wait.... Jin-san....?" She stares after the noping Fatewolf for a moment, then moves to untangle Koji from the blanket. ".....Okay so um... Nano-chan? There's twenty-something Jewel Seeds, and you had 26 muffins in your basket. What.... are the odds that the muffin Arf-tan stole was the Jewel Seed we're looking for?"
Kukai Souma 2017-10-22 03:50:33 85293
Kuktaro sees the Big Bad Fate diving out of the way of the Big Blue Butt and snorts. "Oh well then. If that's all." He closes the door just as Arf dives through the window next time him, letting out a yelp and then a second yelp as his ankles are kicked! He looks down and it's a possessed pair of pussycat boots, motioning him over towards the blanket. He eyes the retreating Fate, then moves over to extricate the cat in the blanket bag. "At least she didn't blow the house down. Cat, are you in here?"
Chris Yukine 2017-10-22 03:52:02 85294
"...Familiar?" The moment of attempted comprehension was enough to allow the game to escape, blinking a few moments before running towards the window, poking her head out in a attempt to catch a final glimpse of her game...to no avail. Cicking her tongue and holstering her guns, Chris sighed to herself, scanning over the room for any other (relatively, mind you) suspicious things. "Tch. Father would've loved having whatever that was for dinner..."
Kokoro Akakuma 2017-10-22 03:56:50 85295
    For the second time today, Kokoro finds herself confused. She just drove him into the ground? "Heh. Not bad, for such a little gu... uh...?" He's... he's stuck to the axe-head. What. "What." Shake. Shake shake. Shake. Sha- and Fate has him. "-huh?! The hell did you come from?!" She can only stand there in stunned silence as Fate SEEMINGLY APPEARS OUT OF NOWHERE to grab the little dude and go running away. Scowling, Kokoro Bunyan whips around to glare at the now-seated blue ox, with a growly, "I thought I told you to make a lotta noise when you saw her!"

    The ox looks Kokoro right in the eyes for exactly five (5) seconds of silence.

    And then.

    "MMMMMOOOOOOOOOOO! MMMMMOOOOO! MMMMMOOOOO MOOOOOOOO MMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
A Siberian cat 2017-10-22 03:57:42 85296
Once freed from the blanket by Kuktaro, the yowling cat pants some.

After about 5 seconds of that, he plops on the bed and begins grooming in an indelicate manner as he says, "Oh Dieu merci, bon monsieur."

And again, the subtitles appear -Oh Thank God, Good Sir.-

The Boots run into the cabin and then dance their heels on the floor a moment, causing the cat to sit up and look over the edge of the bed to them. The butt wriggles, and then the ferociously flexible feline leaps, flips, and lands... IN THE BOOTS.

Now that the pair is back together, he sweeps a deep and courteous bow to Kuktaro, as the pugnacious puss adds, "Attention si vous plais! The loup! They have fled with a muffin!"

He sniffs the air, "Blueberry!"
Nanoha Takamachi 2017-10-22 03:59:23 85297
Red Riding Takamachi gasps! "She has the muffin! Gramma is gonna be so upset." she says sadly. She looks to Rashmi. "Well two bakers dozen is twenty six!" she smiles. OHhhhh that's why. "Huh. Jewel Seed? I don't.. think so?..." at least Raising Heart didn't DETECT a Jewel Seed.

Of course. Didn't specify WHO'S GOAL had to completed. And then there is mooing. What? WHY IS THERE MOOING!?

She peeks out the broken window.

"But Blueberry is my favorite....." she says. May not be true. Maybe it's Red Riding Hood's favorite.

"Wow, that's a big ox!" she insists loudly.

Then she makes for the door. Maybe they can catch Fate... somehow. In another bizzaro dimension. Where they actually catch up with that much of a headstart....
Fate Testarossa 2017-10-22 04:09:08 85299
    It's back down on all fours and Fate flees. Loping at top speed, the wolf-girl's main priority right now is her pack. Jin and Arf. She doesn't stop for a while, but when she does, she's panting for air and to cool down. Arf plops down. Fate follows, and gently sets tiny Jin down as well.
    Stomachs growl angrily.
    For a moment a forlorn Fate lets her head hang. Before Arf tugs on her furs. The smaller wolf holds up the muffin. It's probably not enough for two starving wolves and a little tin man but... Fate takes it gently in hand and starts dividing it up wordlessly. A fair portion is broken off for the stalwart little soldier. Then Fate breaks it again, giving the bigger half to Arf, painfully willing to accept the smaller piece as...
    A gleaming blue gem falls from where it was baked into the muffin.
    Blueberry indeed.