Amu Hinamori was sitting in bed, snuggled up in a nice, warm blanket. She was actually feeling a lot better, she'd even be cleared to go to school in a few days, yay! She gave a light yawn before reaching over and taking her drink, sipping it. She was looking loads better, too. Granted, a lot of that was likely because she'd been able to take a shower.
Her spirits were in their eggs, resting as well. A single magazine was laying on the bed besides her, closed for now but she'd start going through it again eventually. Everyone was at school now so she was bored.
Lacrima stopped going to school when she ran away. She misses it. No one expects anything from you at school except sit there and learn in class. It doesn't matter that she doesn't feel happy or look happy in it.
A tiny bat flies in through the cracked open patio window. It's purple. It's Lacrima, obviously. She arrived this way last time too.
There is a poof and it's Lacrima--- in her casual normal clothes. She head tilts.
A pause. "Hello, Amu." she says softly.
"...I hope you don't mind I flew in." another pause.
"Um, are you feeling better yet?" she asks.
She's speaking more stilted than usual. Same tone of voice though.
Amu Hinamori blinked and sat up. she grinned and patted the bed besides her. "Yup! Honestly, aside from the occasional cough, I feel great. My medication has really been helping." She mentally sqwueed. Lacrima had visited her TWICE! From the rather tsundere woman, that definitely meant something. Even though she doubted the woman even realized that.
"I'll be all cleared in a few days and then it'll be back to fighting monsters and fawning over Tadase-kun." She blinked suddenly and her cheeks went red. "Did... did I say that last part out loud?"
Lacrima head tilts. She had. But Amu's tried to help her. Right? She's kept her promise so far, right? Surely- she had to at least visit- even if she didn't want to. Did she want to right now? She didn't know.
Maybe there was nothing else to do. Maybe something nagged her to- in the back of her mind.
"Ah- that's good." a pause. "Yes, you did." she says matter of factly.
"If you mean the part about Tadase." another pause.
"Why do you need to fawn over him if you're already dating...?" a pause.
"...is it normal. To fawn over someone?" she asks curiously. She doesn't... fawn over Natsumi-chan. Does she?
Amu Hinamori blinked and then blushed and cupped her cheeks and kinda wiggled in place, pulling her knees up to her face and moaning. "Nooooo it's nooooot! I can'thelp it though! He's just so, incredibly, magnificently, amazingly, cute! Like, oh my gosh! I just see him and I want to be with him always and have his arms around me and hug me and kiss me and oh ym gosh he kissed me and it was soooooo wonderful he was soooo kingly and I just EEEEEE!"
She then glanced up, her face red. "S-sorry. I'm just... really, really in love and Tadase-kun is just soooo cuuuuuute! I can't imagine what he sees in someone as plain as me." She then sighed. She held out a hand and gently placed it on Lacrima's. "So... I do plan to start feeding you again. But, ummm, this time, a little more carefully. How about to start off, twice a week? Once in the middle of the week, then at the end? From there, we can go a bit further if I feel I'm up to it. Okay?"
Lacrima head tilts. "But I thought you said there were others?" she asks curiously and scratches the side of her head confusingly. She seems really confused overall by this as she keeps her generally neutral expression about it.
Is this how someone in love acts? She doesn't act like this. But this doesn't surprise her. She's broken. She never felt love before she became this thing. She has no baseline for it- like most other feelings.
Amu goes on about a feeding schedule. "That's fine." she says. "As long as it doesn't result in any of your friends visiting me and trying to hurt me." she frowns.
"That does mean I am needing to find an alternate source if I get in a fight or otherwise need to expend more than usual." she says. "But that's fine." she says.
"Which is likely soon." she frowns.
Amu Hinamori blinked and then blushed. "W-well, I mean, sometimes I... t-that's not really... I don't love them like i love him. I think." She buried her face and groaned.
Then she heard that. Alarm bells went off in her head. She reached out andgrabbed Lacrima's hand, a frown on her lips. "Lacrima-chan? In a fight? What's wrong? Are you in danger? Do you need help? Listen, if you're in trouble, you can tell me. I can help you. Or at least try." She gave her most comforting voice.
Lacrima blinks and frowns. "It's complicated." she says.
"I keep feeling like I'm..."
"Being called. Somewhere. I really want to follow it." she says. "I feel like people may not like what it does to me if I go. People will try to stop me. I keep feeling like somethings....." she shakes her head and sighs.
"This power. It.. originated. In Spain." she says. "It's why-- I.. can speak Spanish. Because person who willed it into power spoke that language." she says.
"I know the most likely place. Jiaying-chan did some footwork for me." she says.
"I feel like."
"I need to go there." she says quietly.
"I feel like...it'll make me ... whole... or fix me... or.. or... make me stable.. but.. I don't know what that means." she says quietly. "But anything is ... so much better. Than being confused and-- and-- going off on people for small tiny grammar gaffes..." she says.
Amu Hinamori blinked and gave her hand a little squeeze. She chewed on her lower lip. After a few moments she sighed. "I... wish I could say I'd come with you, but I well... couldn't really afford it and I'd only be able to do a weekend trip, even if I could get my parents to help." She gave the hand another tight squeeze.
Slowly she sidled over to sit besides her. She reached up and cupped her cheek, looking her in the eye. "I... can't tell you what to do. but, if you think this is what's best for you. If you think maybe this will help... fix you. I think you should do it. And I think you should take friends with you, who can keep you safe. But if this can help you, then I support you going." she gave her a big smile. "Just uhhhh, make sure to call me every day?"
Lacrima frowns. "Jia-chan said the same thing. That I'm not going unless I bring someone who's capable of knocking me upside the head." she frowns. "I don't think she has the right to choose for me. But I think she's right." she says quietly.
"But what if... what if what's there can fix me? Give me... something. Back I had. I'll even settle for.. calm.." she says. "controllable." she says.
"I can go back home then." she says. "I wouldn't have to worry about hurting my family..."
Amu Hinamori nodded, gently patting her cheek. "Then that's it. We're not saying don't go. If anything, we're encouraging you. at least, I am. We're just saying don't go alone. Find someone who can go with you. How about... ummmm... Jia-chan? Does she go to school? Or maybe an adult. Oh! Or sailor moo... actually thatt mgiht not end well. But don't go alone. You need to have someone there to help you. To make sure things don't get out of control."
She gave another sigh. "I'm sorry, I really wish I could come with you and help you, but... I'm still a kid. I can't be gone that long. But maybe Jia-chan? Have her come with you and help you. Keep you safe in case things go wrong. That way you can be safe and find what you're looking for."
Lacrima head tilts. "Jia-chan can't come. It's why she told me to take someone who can. I'm not asking you to." she says flatly. "I may go alone anyways." she says. "Or take someone I trust." she says. "Not that..."
"I don't trust you." she says.
"But." she says.
"I'd rather..." she says. "You can't.. understand...."
She sort of grates her teeth. She's stumbling over words.
"You don't know what it's like to go from the light to the darkness." she says quietly.
Amu Hinamori blinked a few times. She lowered her eyes and stared at the bed. Then, she moved forward and gave her a hug. "You're right. I wish you weren't, but you're right. I still don't know what it's like to... feel like you. I wish I could, so I could know how to help you. But..." The thought of becoming like her? NO! "But please, Lacrima-chan, if it comes down to it... please don't go alone. If you have to, take me. If you're willing to wait a..." She paused and thought.
"How much does a ticket there cost? A... year? I can probably come. During summer break. And I can help you? Just... please. Don't go alone. If not Jia-chan, find someone who can help you. Anyone." She shuddered at the thought of Lacrima being off on her own with something like THAT happening.
Lacrima head tilts. "I'd be paying for whoever cames ticket, most likely." she says quietly. "My... employer, pays me well enough." she says. "It's not like we'd be there long." she says.
She frowns. "I'll think about it. Regardless. I'm trying to. Find a way to get there. Without a plane too." she says.
"I don't think a Dusk Zone jump that far is wise or possible." she says.
She frowns. "Mortals fear what they don't understand. Just because something looks like an awful monster doesn't mean it is." she says frankly. "I don't want you or anyone to.. mess something up because you purify first." she mutters.
Amu Hinamori blinked a few times. "Wait, you're paying?" She paused and then sighed. "How ummmm... long would you be there for?" She crossed her arms and considered it. she then crigned. "Yeah. Ummmm... I think a plane would be best. Definitely not dusk zone. That's dangerous." She did consider it for a moment. "Lacrima-chan? Do... you trust me? I mean... if it comes down to it, do you trust that I'll do what I say I'll do?"
She gave a small little smile and pulled back from the hug.
Lacrima mostly just sort of languished in the hug. She sighs a bit.
"I'm not sure." she says. "I say that honestly." she says. "Too many people have promised me... help. And friendship. But then forget the promise the moment they thought what they said didn't apply to them." she frowns.
"Such as being told to find 'willing' meals-- but oh noooo when that turned out to be their friend suddenly they hate me for doing what they asked of me." she spits out.
"I don't trust you." she says. "I know that may hurt you. I'am trying very hard to believe what you tell me." she says. "I am giving you a chance because that's what people like Kunzite and Mamoru said I should try." she says. "To give people chances to help me." she says quietly.
Amu Hinamori blinked and then slowly pulled back a little further. Still, she smiled. "I... I understand that. It's fair. It's... understandable." Her hand gently reached out and squeezed her hand. "... if you find a way to go there without... being too long. Just a few days or something, I can make up a story. If it comes to it... take me with you."
She slowly looked up into her eyes. "If it happens, I promise to keep an open mind. I... won't purify anything. Unless you tell me to. Okay? I'll trust your judgment if... you can just try to trust me for this? Please?" A very weak smile.
Lacrima frowns. "Fine." she says a little resigned. "I'll let you know if I decide to take people or not." she says quietly.
"I can handle travel arrangements. I'm not dealing with your parents if you get caught." she says. "They can deal with the sight of me disappearing into vaporous nothing." she says. "If they try to chide me for taking you anywhere."
"I have. To go. This is agitating me." she says quietly as she turns to the patio door and creaks it open a little.
"....However...."
"Thank you. For trying." she says quietly.
Then like that. She's a tiny purple bat again. And she's off into the outside to flutter back home to Jia-chan's for now.
Amu Hinamori watched the girl go and then closed her eyes, collapsing back into bed. She could already see what was going to happen. The others were going to be pissed and upset. So she'd best not tell them. Could she tell nades? No, after this entire ordeal, it'd be better to ask after she got back.
But what if it was dangerous? what if really bad things ended up happening? What if she had to break her word and purify Lacrima? She pulled her blanket closer.
But Lacrima was her friend, right? That meant she had to help her. And this was definitely something she needed help with. Lacrima couldn't go on her own, not this time. Not to this. It just... no. She shuddered and hugged herself again.
It might not even happen, so why worry? She was sure it'd all work out in the end.