The Flavor of Hurt


In a rare quiet moment at D-Point, Mercury and Moon discuss hurt and guilt.

Date: 2016-03-10
Pose Count: 14
Ami Mizuno 2016-03-10 23:41:21 33087
It's cold at the North Pole. This shouldn't be a terribly meaningful statement, but Sailor Mercury came prepared for typical North Pole conditions, and relied heavily on her henshin's ability to deal with the chill. She never expected a magical blizzard that nearly encompassed the whole of the north, and which actually managed to be cold enough to chill her skin through the magical barrier of her henshin.

Just about now, Sailor Mercury is feeling a bit like a failure. She brought everyone here--rushed everyone here--with the intention of getting Sailor Moon a chance to defeat Metallia. But upon arrival the group was immediately thrown about by the massive storm.

And less than half of the group carries Virtue phones. Nevertheless, Virtue Phones are the only way Ami really has to track anyone.

Standing in the mouth of a cave, sheltered minorly from the blasting wind and driving snow, Mercury's connection to her computer is active and live, sending out a pulse to every Virtue Phone in the area, imploring them to gather and bring everyone with them to that same cave.

Have people already died, out there in this weather? Has Mercury brought all of them here, only to never even get the opportunity to face Metallia and Beryl?

Is this better than last time?

All questions running through Mercury's mind, even as she stands at the doorway, looking for some sign of life; praying that more than the few already in the cave behind her will find her signal and follow it to regroup.
Usagi Tsukino 2016-03-10 23:48:46 33090
Separation. It seems to be a recurring theme here at D-Point.

And whoever designed the senshi outfits obviously had no concept on temperature. At least when it didn't involve anything above freezing.

It's not the pinging on the Virtue Phone that causes her to find the cave, though perhaps the vibrations of it in her subspace pocket echo along her hip like the ghost vibration of an absent cell phone.

Whatever it is, when she sees Mercury, she stops in her tracks as her heart leaps to her throat. Her voice is small, and what body it has is stolen by the wind. "Ami-chan."

She makes to run for her friend, the first of her senshi she's seen since coming here.

She stops, though, a feeling of defeat whirling in her chest. "How do I know its you?"

It would be fitting that Mercury would be a ploy, another stab of betrayal from a familiar face. (Though this one completely unintentional of the original owner.)
Ami Mizuno 2016-03-10 23:56:20 33095
Ami looks up at the call of her name--her real name. No one in the Dark Kingdom should know that name, which means she's quite certain that this is, "SAILOR MOON!" Relief floods through Ami. The Princess Lives.

She rushes forward into the cold of the blizzard, shivering against it as she approaches her best friend. Except Usagi's challenge hangs in the air, and Ami for a brief moment has no idea how to counter it.

She stares for a moment, opening her mouth, then admits, "My father sent me a postcard for my birthday last year. I showed it to you: it was a lighthouse at night, and its beams were pointed out to sea. In the distance was a girl swimming, illuminated by the light from the lighthouse. It was supposed to be me."
Usagi Tsukino 2016-03-11 00:04:10 33097
Her face crumbles and the tears that sting her eyes ice along her lashes. She has to blink a few times, rub harshly, to get them clear.

She takes off at a sprint toward Mercury. Coming from anyone else, this could very much look like an attack. But this is Sailor Moon, it's Usagi, and Mercury probably has about two seconds to brace herself against another type of attack altogether.

It's almost a death grip she has Mercury in. "Homu-chan and Mado--" She chokes off, unable to finish. "And I keep losing people. And then I thought--" A deep, wavering breathe. "I didn't want it to be you, too."
Ami Mizuno 2016-03-11 00:25:43 33105
Sailor Mercury expected this attack in the first place, and she's more than prepared for it when it comes. She greets Sailor Moon with open arms, and wraps them around her friend in a tight hug. She doesn't even try to keep her feet as Usagi barrels into her; she redirects the energy into a slow and deliberate fall to her knees, and brings Usagi with her. Safely to the ground, she hugs her close.

"I'm safe," Ami promises Usagi as best she can, though she's fairly certain that 'Homu-chan' (that must be Homura) and 'Mado' (is that the pink-haired girl? Madoka?) are not.

"I'm sorry I lost everyone," Mercury says to Sailor Moon worriedly. "I'm so sorry; this wasn't supposed to happen. But we can't give up hope. We've got to finish this."
Usagi Tsukino 2016-03-11 00:36:37 33109
Her arms tighten around Mercury at the word 'safe,' and her responding 'good' is lost behind the lump in her throat. Her knees are cold, but she doesn't care.

When she's able to speak, her voice is strained. "It wasn't your fault. We were supposed to be five."

And she doesn't blame Venus, either.

A couple more seconds of sniffling, and she continues. "I always have hope. Even when I don't."
Ami Mizuno 2016-03-11 00:45:06 33112
Mercury squeezes Sailor Moon tightly, then shivers. "Come on, let's get inside. It's a small cave, but it's warmer; our Henshins can fight off the cold in there."

Ami stands back up, helping Usagi to her feet at the same time, then then walks with her, still hugging close, to the cave. Inside, several others have already gathered deeper in, but Ami remains near the mouth of the cave in case others come to find them.

But the topic at hand really does need addressing. "I don't know what we were supposed to be," Mercury says quietly. "But I feel like we're doing everything wrong all over again. And I feel like it is my fault. This was my plan. And I pushed everyone into it. We weren't ready. And we weren't prepared."
Usagi Tsukino 2016-03-11 01:01:14 33117
Moon follows Mercury to the cave, and once their inside she curls against the ice wall, trying to regain some of her lost heat.

What was the plan? Leave them out here until they froze to death?

So fair, Metallia.

"We're supposed to be together." Her voice is firm, with a twinge of anger. She's not even sure where it's directed. "We're not a military, we're units of a whole." She sniffs and wipes her nose, a stubborn nose in the air.

"We're doing it right this time. Even though things are a mess right now, the time is now. We're supposed to be here now. We're as prepared as we can be, Mercury. If we waited any longer, we would have lost before we even began, because it would have given us too much time to doubt ourselves."

Her words aren't mean, of course. They're not accusatory. They should be encouraging, if the person she was trying to convince the most was herself.
Ami Mizuno 2016-03-11 02:59:39 33148
"I already doubt myself," Mercury tells Sailor Moon honestly, with a sigh. "It's been that way since we thought he was dead," she says quietly. "Every time I make a plan, lately, it seems to go wrong. The Orphanage. Jadeite. Zoisite. Kunzite."

Sailor Mercury puts her head on Usagi's shoulder and sighs. "If it weren't for you constantly reminding me how amazing you think I am, I'd probably have given up. Sometimes I still want to. And then ..." she trails off, then grimaces. "Then sometimes I feel like we aren't even all on the same team anymore, and that feels like my fault, too."
Usagi Tsukino 2016-03-11 03:15:04 33152
It's seemless. Effortless.

The comforted becomes the comforting.

Sailor Moon hugs Ami close, stroking the slightly taller girl's short hair. "I only remind you of the truth, Ami-chan." She sighs. "The Orphanage? We knew that was a long shot going in. In the end, we got the boys back, all of them. Even if one of them's a rock, we still have him. We're not playing with all the pieces, we can't see the entire board, and yet look how far we've gotten."

More of a hug. "We're all on the same team, Mercury. You, me? Mars and Jupiter? We're a team. I felt the way you guys have trust and faith in me when we faced Kunzite. I know you guys had to have felt the same from me. A team doesn't always have to agree. We just have to trust each other to do what needs to be done when the time is right. Venus?" Sailor Moon sighs. "One day, maybe. I still have hope for her."
Ami Mizuno 2016-03-11 04:07:19 33173
"I know we are," Mercury says quietly, returning Usagi's hug. "But Venus ..." she trails off, then sighs. "I don't know. I don't think she likes me. I feel like every time I do what she asks, she acts as though I've ruined everything."

"I'm sorry," Mercury says softly. "I shouldn't be complaining about this when we're so close to victory. And I know she's upset you, too. Maybe that's just all she knows how to be. But it's hurtful."
Usagi Tsukino 2016-03-11 04:14:15 33176
"I don't think it's just you, feeling that way. I'm pretty sure she hates me." It stings, of course. It's not a small sting. It's more a gaping bite somplace in her soul. But for now, she patches it up with how she knows her other girls feel about her, and it's enough until they're out of here and home.
Ami Mizuno 2016-03-11 04:20:36 33178
Ami winces and hugs Usagi tightly. "I don't," she emphasizes, even though Usagi knows that already. "And if we're really going to face the end of the world, I'm really glad I've at least got you here to face it with. I'd be so lost without you, Usagi-chan."
Usagi Tsukino 2016-03-11 04:25:12 33180
She knows it. Of course she knows it. But that doesn't stop the words from filling in even more of those tiny holes.

"I'd be lost without you, too."