3722/Dancing Shark

Dancing Shark
Date of Scene:	30 April 2019
Location:	Text messages
Synopsis:	Kazuo attempts to recruit Naru to help de-sharkify the apartment. Naru is not exactly sympathetic.
Cast of Characters:	Kunzite, Naru Osaka

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Kunzite has posed:
<TXT> I don't suppose I could convince you to consider opening an adopt-a-shark franchise.

Naru Osaka has posed:
<TXT from Naru> This feels like there will be a punch line in a moment.

Kunzite has posed:
<TXT> I could offer a certain amount of stock free of charge, as long as you agreed not to sell it back to Jadeite.

Naru Osaka has posed:
<TXT from Naru> I feel that the only applicable reply here is 'I have questions', which feels like we've gone back in time.

Kunzite has posed:
<TXT> Also I assure you that Jadeite has no other similarities to Anish Kapoor than "sculptor," "living human," and "please don't help him stock up on this one thing."

Naru Osaka has posed:
<TXT from Naru> Why and where do you have sharks? And what kind? And Why? Wait, I asked that already, but it feels as if it could use a repeat.

Kunzite has posed:
Kazuo's next text is a photo of a plushie shark wedged into familiar couch cushions.

Naru Osaka has posed:
<TXT from Naru> I did scroll back to confirm that you really did type 'shark'. ... oh thank all the gods it's a plushie.

Kunzite has posed:
<TXT> Jadeite has been bored. They are everywhere. And they sing.

Naru Osaka has posed:
<TXT from Naru> When I'm bored, you guys get muffins. WE need to teach him how to bake.
<TXT from Naru> Do they sing well?

Kunzite has posed:
The slight delay is undoubtedly expected.
<TXT from Kazuo> They sing ... creatively.

Naru Osaka has posed:
<TXT from Naru> I'll note that as a 'no.'
<TXT from Naru> Why shark stuffies?

Kunzite has posed:
<TXT> There's an English-language children's song. When Jadeite's hand was injured, Neil convinced him to sing it as a distraction.
<TXT> He never stopped.
<TXT> I may have retaliated slightly.
<TXT> Now there are apparently shark wars.

Naru Osaka has posed:
<TXT from Naru> I feared it was That Song. My fears have been realized.

Kunzite has posed:
<TXT> He managed to acquire high-quality recordings of it set to various other tunes.

Naru Osaka has posed:
<TXT from Naru> I never did peg Jadeite for evil. Hunh. My oversight.

Kunzite has posed:
<TXT> I can't entirely blame him for honing his skills.

Naru Osaka has posed:
<TXT from Naru> I will not offer to sketch some sharks for you. :)

Kunzite has posed:
<TXT from Kazuo> I am incapable of measuring my gratitude.

Naru Osaka has posed:
<TXT from Naru> <photo of a quick sketch of a dancing shark> Okay, I couldn't help myself. But at least there's no magic.

Kunzite has posed:
<TXT> If the next one sings ABBA, I will know who to blame.

Naru Osaka has posed:
<TXT from Naru> <adds to the sketch a disco ball, and gives the shark a pants suit> Dancing Shark!