2136/No Appreciation For The Classics

No Appreciation For The Classics
Date of Scene:	18 November 2016
Location:	Earth Court Frat House
Synopsis:	Shitennou downtime, aka "Mamoru populates his apartment entirely with trolls." Oh, and Neph and Kyouko and Kunzite talk some about Naru and Alexis, too.
Cast of Characters:	Nephrite, Kyouko Sakura, Kunzite

---

Nephrite has posed:
Fall days are giving way to the beginnings of a wintery chill, but things are cozy in the Earth Court Frat House. (For one thing, no windows or doors have been broken in a while.) It's one of those rare times of day when Nephrite's mostly-nocturnal schedule intersects with other people's more normal ones.

Naturally, that means he has to make up for lost time by playing the entire soundtrack for the 1990 motion picture film Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on his phone while he is making a sandwich in the kitchen. The fact that anybody in the living room is forced to partake of the soundtrack is, in fact, motivation to turn it up louder. And sing along.

Kyouko Sakura has posed:
    As opposed to Nephrite, Kyouko's sleep schedule has actually become more diurnal over the last year- while a full-time Puella, she had mostly been active at night, hunting Witches. But since she's gotten an actual job, and has had to take care of Momo, she's gradually migrated towards a more 'normal' sleep schedule, if only so she can handle working at the conbenie without being a zombie.

    Although she doesn't live at the ECFH, she does live just downstairs, and she spends a fair amount of time hanging around. It's no surprise to find her in the living room, reading some trashy manga she picked up at work, stretched out on one of the couches with her legs propped up over the back. She vaugely registers someone coming in and entering the kitchen, but that's hardly unusual.

    What is unusual is the ancient music which starts blasting out over the living room. She sits up, scowling over the back of the couch. "Hey! Keep it down with the oldies, will ya? I can't concentrate on my schlock!"

Kunzite has posed:
It's the 'reading some trashy manga' that's the signal she feels at home, really. Occupying furniture has been a thing for a year, eating their food for half again, but outing herself as (a) reading at all and (b) reading that is an entirely different thing.

The prime target for Nephrite's current trolling has already given up on the book he's been intermittently trying to work his way through for weeks, in favor of intermittent silent glowering in the direction of the kitchen. (Its target is quite aware, given that while there's a counter between living room and kitchen, there's no actual solid wall, here.) When Kyouko actually calls over, though, Kunzite shakes his head. "Don't encourage him," he says. "He'll only find worse."

There is worse. That's the horrible part.

Nephrite has posed:
Nephrite snorts at the word oldies. "Kids these days. No appreciation for the classics." He slathers mustard onto a slice of bread. "Kunz, are you going to take that kind of talk? He's not old, he is merely cured like a fine meat." He punctuates this statement by piling salami on the steadily-growing sandwich.

"What kinda schlock? Is it dirty?" He waggles his eyebrows at the Puella.

He gives Kazuo a wounded look. "What do you mean worse? This is good stuff, man. There are reptiles, and they are ninjas, and they like pizza. You can't ask for a better combo."

Kyouko Sakura has posed:
    Kyouko kneels on the couch, folding her arms on the back and resting her chin on them, manga book open and held in one hand, but down against the cushion, holding her place as she glowers at Nephrite across the room. "Just cuz somethin's old don't make it a classic. The Beatles are classic. That," She points with her free hand, "is just old."

    As for Kunzite, she merely sniffs. "Kunzite is more like wine." She shoots a glance at the white-haired boy sitting across from her. "Looks fancy, but then you realize he's gone sour." She grins a one-fanged grin, letting him know she is, of course, only teasing.

    As for her schlock, she scowls again. "No, it ain't dirty. I don't need Momo askin' me uncomfortable questions, she found the soap opera channel on TV last week and wouldn't shut up about 'tongue-wrasslin' ' for days. It's just some dumb manga about kids with superpowers fighting monsters. Totally unoriginal, but it's cheap and it's better'n that mushy stuff."

Kunzite has posed:
That narrow look is turned on Kyouko, due reward for that teasing. (And accuracy.) "This is not the weekend that I have to prove anything to either of you," he says. "Better to save my declining and feeble strength for keeping Naru company in the 10K she's running Sunday." Because all they need, clearly, is Naru's usual youma-magnet nature kicking in when she's unaccompanied in the middle of a crowd of literally ten thousand runners. "The rest of you can indulge your youthful sloth all you like in my absence. With pizza. Though I'd check with Makoto in advance if you intend to make that 'with pizza and reptiles.'"

Momo plus soap operas. That's a topic that makes Kunzite instantly check for his brain's evasion mode and activate it. Kids growing up, he has some experience with. Girls growing up? Noping right out of that one.

Nephrite has posed:
"See, that's where you're wrong. Kunzite was born sour. Maybe they picked his grapes too soon." Nephrite finishes stacking the mountain of meat, cheese, lettuce, and banana peppers onto a very mustardy slice of bread and lays the other slice on top before returning ingredients to the fridge. This kitchen is the domain of both Makoto and Kazuo, after all, and both of them would be liable to grow irritable if he left behind too much evidence of his intrusion. "Do they have tents set up at those marathons so senior citizens aren't exposed to the elements? Wouldn't want you to catch a chill at your age."

He carries the sandwich tower into the living room. "Aw, little Momo is asking about smooching? Maybe you could get her an instructional booklet and just leave it for her to find. It can't be worse than soap operas."

As he plops down in one of the chairs, Nephrite snickers. "Kids with superpowers? Sounds fake."

Kyouko Sakura has posed:
    "Totally fake. Nobody even gets killed." Kyouko scoffs, dismissively, turning around as Nephrite comes into the proper part of the living room. She keeps the book though- and the number on the side says "volume 14". Maybe something appeals to her about a world where people fight monsters and nobody dies. Sometimes you need a little fiction- even if it's not very believable.

    She snickers slightly at the digs at Kunzite.. but then, perhaps feeling a bit bad, gets up and walks over to where he sits to lean on the back of his chair and drape her arms over him from behind semi-protectively. "Aw, don' worry, nii-chan. Naru will protect you."

    Then she scowls from that position once again at Nephrite. "Dude, if there was a book like that I'd keep it." Then, seeming to realize what she just said, she blushes and hides her face behind Kunzite's head.

Kunzite has posed:
"Can't catch a chill," Kunzite replies. "I have a cape." Upon which, to demonstrate precisely what cape he's referring to, he puts a hand securely on one of the arms Kyouko draped around him. Puellacape. Or Puella something, given that the next thing he does is reach up and back to hook a hand under Kyouko's shoulder and try to haul her over the back of the chair. Not too hard, since Mamoru gets annoyed at things like having to replace the coffee table. And not too fast, since Kyouko isn't yet accustomed to the random more physical squabbles, and he has reason to know that her reflexively stabbing people involves very, very good judgment of anatomy on the fly.

Nephrite has posed:
Nephrite chuckles, pulling out his phone. "Come on, there's a book for everything, especially dirty things. Want to take bets on how many results I get on Amazon if I type in 'how to kiss?'" He's now got the sandwich in one hand and his phone in the other, typing awkwardly with his thumb.

He's also got the sandwich shoved into his mouth when Kunzite makes his comment, and grappling has already ensued before he can chew enough to comment with a half-full mouth, "didn't think red was your color."

Kyouko Sakura has posed:
    Kyouko sqwuaks as Kunzite grabs her and hauls her bodily over the chair- she's actually lighter than she looks, a passing reminder that for as much as she eats, she actually doesn't weight much. Must be that fast teenage metabolism. While, had she a weapon to hand, stabbing might have ensued, Kunzite is wise enough to make it more of a pull and less of a 'throw', which means she can process it as playful and prevent her instincts from kicking in.

    But she does prove how agile she is, because she turns the motion into a rather graceful roll-somersaulting over Kunzite entirely, freeing herself of his grip, and tumbling upright without seeming to break stride. In the same motion, she's over to Nephrite, and snatches the phone out of his hand before coming to rest with her back against the side of his chair, sitting on the ground.

    She eyes the results for a moment, then closes the window and tosses the phone back up onto his lap. "Bah. I don't learn from readin' books. I learn how to do somethin' by just doing it." She pauses, seeming to realize how this sounds given the context, and quickly adds, "Not that I been learnin' this in particular, just to be clear, but.. y'know."

Kunzite has posed:
Kunzite's book tumbles to the floor in Kyouko's wake, sprawling awkwardly with bent cover and a ruffling-paper sound, and Kunzite actually laughs; it's a brief, quiet thing, but for two seconds or so it's a thing that exists. He shifts his weight, leaning on the arm farther from Nephrite to regard the pair of them with eyes creased. "Always did look better on you," he notes.

(Hopefully he means the color. Makoto might have issues if he meant Kyouko, and a lot of people might have issues if he meant the kissing.)

"Speaking of learning by doing. And speaking of Naru." His tone stays casual, and so does his body language -- a little less trolling for a moment, but nothing actually serious. And nothing to interrupt the Amazon threats for. "You've been sparring with her off and on, Kyouko. Has anything out of the ordinary happened this month?"

Nephrite has posed:
Nephrite pauses in his chewing for a moment, to note the highly elusive Kunzite laugh. It is a rare beast, one likely to make an immediate exit if disrupted or stared at too directly. So he chooses not to point it out. Only grins lazily as he nudges his fellow red-clad Shitennou. "Alas, some of us were born to be autumns, and some were born to be winters."

The teasing returns to his voice when Kyouko steals his phone, only to chuck it into his lap. "Uh huh," Nephrite grins. "Not learning at all. I gotcha." He picks his phone back up. "So I'll just order two or three of them and have them sent to your place, shall I?"

Kyouko Sakura has posed:
    Kyouko turns around and gives Nephrite her best death-stare. It's pretty good too- for a second, she almost looks like a younger, female Kunzite. They must be spending too much time together. "Don't you effing dare. I'm basically ruined already but if you corrupt my little sister, there will only be four Shitennou again, and I ain't planning on quitting."

    Then she winks, before turning to look at Kunzite, shrugging to his question about Naru. "Yeah, she and Mako-can and I been gettin' together once a week over at the gym and training. Not always sparring, sometimes other stuff but.. no, nothin' really out of the ordinary. She was askin' me about Alex the other day.. she's concerned that he'll get in over his head tryin' to fight supernatural stuff because he don't know when to back down. I didn't really have any good advice to give her, though.." A brief, mildly unhappy shrug. "Wish I did, but.."

Kunzite has posed:
"Don't murder Nephrite," Kunzite notes, sounding remarkably unconcerned. "It would discourage Makoto from using the kitchen." He leans down to retrieve his book, idly trying to flatten out the crease in the glaringly orange cover with his thumb. Orange is also definitely not his color. "Besides, if he wants to try to use your address as a cover for studying up, it'd be unfair to her to discourage him."

The confirmation that nothing out of the ordinary has been happening with Naru gets a brief nod; he glances back to Nephrite, not to disparage his boyfriend skills this time. "Can't remember. Did you meet Alexis yet? The German boyfriend, doesn't talk much?"

(Hypocrisy: sometimes a fine art.)

Nephrite has posed:
It's a pretty impressive glare. Very Kunzite-esque. Fortunately, Nephrite has been weathering Kunzite glares for eons. He smugly continues to chew on his sandwich without breaking eye contact. Not sending the books to her place, then. Might still order them and have them shipped here, though. He's running down the list of ways that he can casually slip them to her when she least expects it.

Kunzite's comment gets a brief snort. "You can't improve upon perfection. Sounds like you're hoping for a copy in your stocking, though."

He nods at the more serious question, though. "He was at the roof barbecue, right? I encountered him at some point in between serving burgers and beer. Oddly enough, a normal guy showing up to one of our parties stands out a bit."

Kyouko Sakura has posed:
    "But he's so stabbable.." Kyouko faux-complains to Kunzite at his request that she not murder Nephrite. She sighs and walks back over to her original couch, flopping onto it and kicking her legs up. "Fine. I know it's just because you're jealous of my stabbings." She tells Kunzite.

    Then she shrugs slightly at the continued talk about Alex. "He seems like an okay dude, and Naru-chan likes him so that's gotta count for somethin'. She was asking how I got along when I lost my powers, hopin' that I would have some insight into how he might do likewise, but unfortunately the only answer I could give her was 'not very well'."

    After all, it was her inability to cope with not having powers that led her to making a deal with Queen Beryl in the first place.

Kunzite has posed:
'You can't improve upon perfection' prompts Kunzite to glance ceilingward in silent appeal to nothing in particular. It's the next sentence that gets the real reaction: a perplexed frown. "In my what?"

(He may be regretting that comment for the rest of the year. Given that Mamoru is already teasing Kunzite about last year's fried chicken youma, actually, the compounding may mean that he regrets it for the rest of forever.)

He shakes his head, and tells Kyouko deadpan, "Of course I am. Everyone is jealous of your stabbings." Possibly especially Alex. Nephrite's recollection of the boy prompts Kunzite to nod back to him. "That's right. When Naru threw him in the deep end. Not much of a swimmer, but he didn't outright drown." He taps a fingertip against the book he's mostly ignoring. "Akemi uses mundane weaponry half the time, doesn't she? She might have some idea whether there's any point in his trying."

Sadly, there is a difference between mundane weaponry meaning 'keeps an actual arsenal on hand at all times, and concentrates it with timestop powers' and mundane weaponry meaning 'punching.' Then again, punching works pretty well for one of the people in the room.

Nephrite has posed:
Nephrite stares past the girl who may or may not have just gauged his stabbability factor at Kunzite. "You have heard of Christmas, right? I know you can't be that much of a recluse."

He chuckles at the memory of the poor normie at a barbecue for superpowered aliens and reincarnated royalty. "Hey, he hasn't run away screaming. He's doing fine."

Kyouko Sakura has posed:
    To be fair, Kyouko keeps a running tabulation of everyone's stabbability factor- she just generally keeps that knowledge to herself. Kunzite will be pleased to know he still ranks very high, although mostly on a theoretical scale, these days.

    One leg crosses over the other as she rescues her schlock manga from where it was discarded when she went to needle Kunzite earlier, idly paging through it to try and locate where she had left off. "He better have heard of Christmas, if he's going to provide me with Christmas Cake as is his sacred duty as my nii-chan." A significant glance at Kunzite, indicating this might be the first he is hearing of this sacred duty.

    She adds, to the more serious aspect of the conversation, "I actually talked to Homura about that somewhat while I was without my powers. She uses magic to add 'oomph' to her bullets- magic oomph, I mean. Regular bullets don't actually do much against magical monsters, it turns out. I mean, they do somethin', but often it's not enough without some boosting. Anyway, Alex doesn't have a magic pocket dimension to hide guns in. The last thing we want is him getting arrested for carrying firearms." Japan has very strict anti-gun laws, after all.

    She shrugs. "I think he'll be okay too, if he's smart enough not to stick his nose where it don't belong." She pauses, then adds, "Naru will take care of him."

Kunzite has posed:
Kunzite gestures irritably with his free hand. "Of course I've heard of Christmas. Strange men coming through windows. Dates. Public moping. Fried chicken." With extra flamethrower, these days. "What does it -- never mind. Asking that question leads nowhere any sane person would want to go, doesn't it."

Thankfully, Kyouko is talking about guns. ... that may be the only time Kunzite ever has that reaction. "Mn. And Mercury won't be around to talk to about possible workarounds for a couple of weeks. Maybe a month. Which is plenty of time for the boy to get himself in trouble. We'll just have to ask the girls to keep an eye on him."

Nephrite has posed:
"I mean, if you're not so sure about this Christmas thing, we can schedule an educational movie session. That sounds like the kind of thing Usagi would be very interested in organizing if I told her you required it." Nephrite grins benevolently. No, of course that is not a threat. It is a generous offer, isn't it?

He shrugs. "Not that I entirely care about the legal factor, but this isn't exactly the first civilian we've had to watch out for, right? Naru-watch has worked out more or less."

Kyouko Sakura has posed:
    "You're forgetting the cake, nii-chan." Kyouko says. She turns the death-stare on him. A taste of his own medicine. "Caaaaaaaaaaaaake."

    Then, on the topic of Naru, she shrugs her shoulders. "Naru-chan has a good head on 'er shoulders. She calls for help when she needs it, which she's not sure that Alex will always do- somethin' about manly pride." She manages to say this with a straight face despite her own notorious pride- she may not be a man, but she's gotten into more than one bad situation by refusing to back down when she clearly should have.

    "And she's developed magic, even if it isn't the most offense-oriented." She sighs absently, laying the book down on her chest. "It'll probably be okay, though. It ain't like we're dealin' with any huge crises right now that would keep us distracted." After a moment she reaches over and knocks on the wooden coffee table.

Kunzite has posed:
"Nephrite," Kunzite says, in that particularly bland tone. "Vegetarian salami is a thing that exists."

Information is likewise surely not a threat. Generosity should be repaid with generosity, clearly!

The death-stare is caught, and held steady; it does not quite become a staredown, because Kunzite sets his book aside again and rises to his feet, crossing to Kyouko's couch. The danger of her new haircut is that it is eminently rufflable. (The danger of ruffling, of course, is that it puts one in range of Kyouko's grabbing.)

However that turns out, it's at worst a few seconds, and possibly no pause at all, before he's considering the other topic again. "Can't guard someone who refuses to be guarded," he says. "But right now he's at a school one of the girls goes to, and there's a good chance that he'll be transferred to Seishou if his parents pull him out. They're close enough to keep half an eye on him. And there's something useful about a girlfriend who can summon flamethrowers; if he can use her weaponry, he might be able to tap Akemi's solution after all. We'll see."

Nephrite has posed:
Nephrite pauses his chewing and glances suspiciously at what is left of the sandwich in his hand, and glares at Kazuo. "Lies."

He does not, it should be noted, bring up Christmas movies again.

"A magical flamethrower would be pretty useful," he muses. "Anyone in your schlock manga have a flamethrower?"

Kyouko Sakura has posed:
    Kyouko gets ruffled. Her new haircut actually benefits from ruffling- artfully dishevelled is the intent, although more often than not she forgets the 'artfully' part and just looks dishevelled, though she manages to pull it off in a way that looks purposeful even when it's really just lack of attention.

    "Grah, gerrof!" She growls, swatting at his hand. She latches onto his wrist and does her best to pull him down onto the couch, which may just result in her pulling herself off of it. One can imagine a brief dustcloud, although in reality it's just Kyouko flailing about for a bit until either Kunzite winds up on the couch or she winds up on the floor- either seems equally likely.

    Either way, possibly upside down, she responds to Nephrite. "No, it's too boring for that. I read it because it's strangely soothing after my real actual life."

Kunzite has posed:
Best odds: both of them wind up more or less on the floor, Kunzite half-seated and Kyouko sprawled half on him and half on the couch. The coffee table gets shoved pretty sharply, but thankfully Nephrite has the Leaning Tower of Sandwich quite literally in hand.

(There will be no further mention or appearance of faux lunchmeats so long as there are no more Usagi Christmas Movie Marathon threats. Fair is fair.)

"I can't imagine why your real actual life would leave you needing soothing," he says deadpan to Kyouko, who is oriented pretty near a hundred and eighty degrees from him, all right. And then to Nephrite, "We already have a magical flamethrower. You complain about him, too."

Nephrite has posed:
For once, there is wrestling in the apartment that does not involve Neph in any way. He can sit on the sidelines and eat his sandwich placidly while the skirmish plays out. It's almost relaxing.

He scowls at Kunzite. "A real magical flamethrower wouldn't bite when I try to carry it."

Kyouko Sakura has posed:
    Kyouko may be on the floor, but being half on top of Kunzite equals victory in her mind- or half a victory, which is close enough as far as she's concerned. She does re-orient herself so she can stretch out and rest her head against his leg before reaching for her book and flipping it open again. "Be quiet, I'm readin' my schlock."